Friday, October 18, 2019

Reality Check


After writing the last series of posts on the submissive craving, I feel the need to do a reality check. I don’t want people to think those posts represent the day-to-day life in a wife-led-marriage (WLM). There is a lot of fantasy, exaggerated dominance, and role play integrated into the concepts I wrote about.  Fantasy days, power trips, and boot camp are different tools that can be used to spice things in the marriage while also helping solidify the WFM.  They are fun ways to make it happen and are not activities that happen on a regular basis.

These activities quench the craving for dominance and control that submissive men desire. I recommend the wife to engage in these fantasy activities on occasion to help satisfy that desire and because of the many other benefits, which I outlined in my last post. The key words in the last sentence are “on occasion.” It is not practical or realistic for most people to live their life in an extreme dominant lifestyle. I also don’t think it’s healthy, nor is it how I would want to live. I don’t want my husband to be a mindless slave. I don’t want to make all the decisions in the house. I want a husband who is my friend and that I can have an intelligent conversation with, and that we can do things together and have fun.

A WLM is not about constant training, punishment, and discipline, and extreme strictness. These things are incorporated into the WLM but are not every-day activities.

The WLM is a mindset that the wife is head of household and has the right to final say in all decisions. The husband yields to the wife’s authority and works to please and satisfy her. The wife’s needs and desires have top priority but she leads the marriage with love and consideration for the husband’s needs and desires and the husband willingly serves his wife out of love and the desire to please her.   

That is the core of WLM. All the other details add the fun and spice to the marriage. Each couple is different and can define those details based on what they want. I hope that series of posts provided ideas that you can apply into your own marriage. Have some fun and give them a try. If you do, please comment and let us know how things went. Also, feel free to share your own ideas and experience.

-Mz Kaylee

Thursday, October 10, 2019

Submissive Craving - Boot Camp (Continued)

PHASE II: INTENSE TRAINING

Friday
I know Thomas will wake up Friday morning with an erection and I know he will be eager and excited for his training. This is his fantasy world and he is on an erotic high. Per my orders, Thomas is up at 6 am on Friday and there is an envelope on the bureau with his morning instructions. He is to shower and shave and practice saying his mantra out loud up until 6:30. In my note I remind him to keep the collar and cuffs on, even in the shower, and that he is not to speak without permission. Included with the note is a very long list of chores. At 6:30 he is to start on the chores, doing them in order and checking each one off as he completes it. The list is exhaustive and pretty much includes cleaning every inch of the house. I even have a few fun tasks thrown in such as arranging my shoes neatly and refolding the panties in my drawer to be nice and neat.  Thomas will be working the list throughout the weekend in between the activities I have planned. He does not know this. He only knows that he is to work down the list until 8:30, at which time he is to start making breakfast and coffee for me so that he can serve it to me in bed at 9:00.

During breakfast he quietly and obediently rubs my feet and then I have him dress me for the day. No fetish wear for me today. I've already accomplished what I wanted to accomplish with fetish wear the night before. Today it's just shorts and a t-shirt for me. While he cleans up breakfast I do a quick inspection of the chores he has already done. This is boot camp so I am expecting perfection and looking for things to correct. It's amazing how many things you can find wrong when you want to. I quietly make a list and then review it with him. During the review his hands are cuffed behind his back and I lead hi, from room-to-room by his hard cock. In start in the living room and I read from the list of what needs to be corrected in that room. Then I place the list on an end table and have him read each item saying "I promise to do better at...[state the item]." I spank him with the riding crop after each item. It's mostly lighter teasing slaps but for things that I think are more serious, he gets a harder slap. I repeat the same process in each room. When we are done, I release his hands and send him off to correct the items.

While he corrects the items,  I relax and read through the list of rules and chores that he prepared in advance of boot camp. The nice thing about having him write out the list is there are many rules that I have created over the years, which I don't remember. Honestly, many of the rules were to appease his submissive nature and I did not pay much attention to after we initially established them. However, he remembers most of them and I am amused at several of the ones that I forgot about. For the most part he does a great job at following the rules and keeping up with his chores. However there are many that he could do better with and I highlight those for discussion later. I also add a few that he forgot about.

Next it is off to do some errands and lunch. The butt plug, a pair of silk panties, cock strap, and clothes are laid out on the bed for him to wear. Once properly dressed I remove his collar and cuffs and we are off. He chauffeurs me  around, quietly follows me in the stores and carries my bags. I instruct him to always remain a step or two behind me. I also let him know that going forward I expect him to follow that rule whenever we go shopping together. I swear his cock twitched in his pants when I said that :) We of course have to stop at Frederick's of Hollywood and browse the sexy lingerie. I pick out a sexy teddy for me to wear later and a few pairs of panties for him.

The rest of the day is more chores and him serving me and pampering me. In the evening I wear the newly bought teddy and have him put on a pair of the panties that I picked out. Then it's lots of teasing for him and lots of pleasure for me. I queen him and have an incredible orgasm while he is denied and left in a horny state. Thomas will tell me several days later that he did not sleep great during boot camp because he was so horny and charged up that he kept waking up with erections.  I loved hearing that!

Saturday
Saturday follows a similar pattern as Friday. He wakes up aroused and then showers and shaves and starts on his chores. Then it's breakfast in bed, more chores for him, and me training him to correctly do the chores. In the afternoon it's more errands and shopping and in the evening, teasing and domination by me. When we are home he is naked and in collar and cuffs. When we go out it's panties, cock strap, and butt plug. I enjoy the ritual of removing and putting the collar and cuffs on him each time we leave and return home. I make sure to tease his cock a bit each time. When I put the items on him, I tell him "good boy" and tell him how sexy he looks in his collar and cuffs. When I take them off, I let him know that I can't wait until to put them back on again when we are home. I am purposely saying things like this to him to reinforce my control over him and acceptance of his servitude toward me. One thing I have learned over the years is that words have a strong impact on submissive men. They cling to them much more then the typical person and it really affects their emotions. Simply saying "I own you" or "your belong to me" has a deep emotional impact. Saying these things when they are in a highly submissive and aroused state has a multiplying effect. Words are very powerful and when used over and over again, I believe they can shape a persons thoughts and emotions.

I keep a very dominant and strict attitude with Thomas throughout the day. I incorporate spanking, corner time, kneeling, and lots of teasing into the training. Even when he is pleasuring me, I am very dominant and commanding with him, telling him what to do and being physically rough with him. By now, he is not the only one immersed into a fantasy world. I am riding on the high of being in control and really getting into the domination role. It's amazing how much you can get into it when you put the real world aside and dive into the fantasy.

PHASE III:STRENGTHENING HIS LOYALTY AND OBEDIENCE
Sunday
On Sunday the focus shifts from him to me. The day will be about him serving and worshiping me. I want a nice breakfast at the table and I want to see fresh flowers on the table. I don't want to get up early so I give him permission to remove his collar and cuffs on his own when he leaves in the morning to buy the flowers. I come down at 9 am and everything is set perfectly and he has the flowers arranged nicely in a vase. This time I allow him to sit at the table and talk with me. It is a first step towards transitioning back to the real world. Although for him, he will ride the submissive high for many days after boot camp.

After breakfast he bathes me and massages me and then I order him to worship my body. He kisses every part of my body. With each kiss he tells me that he worships me and will always obey me.  It's a little over the top but as I said before, this is boot camp and boot camp is over the top. In his perpetually aroused and submissive state, I sense that this type of body worship has a hypnotic effect on him. I like it! In keeping with the theme, I present my ass to him and tell him to worship it. He must first recite his mantra while staring at my ass. I am amused by this and feeling so in control, like I own him. I make him worship my ass with his tongue for several minutes all while telling him how much I love it and how much I love that he serves me, is beneath me, and that this is how it is meant to be. My words are purposeful and meant to dominate him emotionally but also part fantasy. In my opinion words, actions, and attitude are much more powerful and impacting than physical domination.

Next I have him lay on the bed and I tease him to the brink of orgasm over and over again. It's easy to do in his super heightened state of arousal. While I tease him I tell him again how much I enjoy that he is my submissive slave and talk about how it will always be that way. This excites him even more. As a part of the teasing, I place a pair of my used panties over his face and have him worship my panties by taking deep breaths and inhaling my scent. I tell him that each time he breathes in my scent it makes him weaker and more under my control. I continue to tease his cock. Each time he hits the brink of orgasm, I stop and hold his cock and make him recite his mantra to me. With him on the brink and me still holding his cock, he must concentrate very hard not to cum. It is a great mind fuck and so much fun for me to tease him like this. I know he loves these mind games and that this will have an effect on him for weeks after. By the time I am done with him, his mind is complete mush. I leave the room and tell him to come down stairs when he has calmed down.

We go out for lunch. He still must wear the butt plug and cock strap when we are out of the house. He is so horny that the slightest touch from me, a strict tone, or dominant remark sets off his erection. What I enjoy about cock straps/rings, is that they multiply the arousal effect and make it last longer. At least that's what they do to Thomas. When he is wearing one and starts to get aroused, it is hard for him to stop the arousal and he usually ends up with a full erection. Then, because of the strap it take him a long time to calm down, Now add in the effect of the plug in his ass and he has no chances against the forces surrounding him. He has frequent erections while we are out. I have a little fun purposely saying things or giving him a little rub to set him off and then teasing him about how weak he is.

In the afternoon, he kneels before me naked while I sip a glass of wine. Now it's time to use the rules and chores list that he prepared prior to boot camp. I have him read the items on the list that I highlighted. As he reads each highlighted item, he must promise to do better. When he finished the list he promises me that he will continue to do an excellent job with the other items on the list. Finally, I hand him a pen and tell him a few more rules that will go into effect immediately and add a few more chores that he must do going forward. He writes them down on the list and then he repeats his mantra again. Are you seeing the theme here for Sunday - lots of worshipping me, mentally reinforcing is submission, and having him promise to do better. There is a lot of mental domination on Sunday.

His last big assignment for Boot Camp is to write me a letter. At least one page is to be focused on thanking me and telling me how lucky he is to be allowed to serve and obey me and at least one page is to be focused on how he promises to obey and serve me going forward and what he will do to make my life better. I let him know that he will read me the letter before bed and if it is convincing and I am pleased by it, he will earn back the privilege of wearing his wedding ring and being my submissive husband. In his frame of mind, I am sure I will get quite an interesting letter. I limit it to three pages to keep him from going too far off the rails. While he writes his letter, I relax and watch TV.

In the evening, as promised, he reads his letter out loud to me. I am sitting in a chair while he kneels before me wearing nothing but a cute pair of panties when he reads the letter. I enjoy his letter and some of the things he writes makes me laugh. I tell him he has earned back the privilege of being my submissive husband and can wear his wedding ring again. Before I place the ring on his finger, I tell him that the ring has new meaning compared to the first time I put it on him when we were married. Not only is it a symbol of our never ending love but it is also a symbol of his eternal submission and obedience to me. I have him pledge this to me before I place the ring on his finger.

I end the night and boot camp by queening him. In my opinion, queening is one of the most dominant things a woman can do to a man. Being on top of him,fully in control while he works diligently to pleasure me is liberating. It is a great way to end the session. I know he is horny and ready to explode but I decide not to allow him an orgasm. I want his horniness to spill into the week so that boot camp has a lasting effect on him. I feel like an orgasm for him at this point would totally wipe him out and would lessen the effects of boot camp. He will have to wait until the next weekend for his orgasm.

Boot Camp Conclusion
There it is...my intense boot camp. This post was much more detailed and personal than what I usually write but sometimes the best way to explain things is to to tell the story and share actual experiences. Hopefully you get the gist of what can be done. You can go more extreme or less extreme depending on your comfort with it and what you want to accomplish but you do want to make sure your boot camp is more structured and intense then what you normally do. It's takes quite a bit of planning to make it effective. I thought the way I structured it into the three phases (breaking him down, intense training, and strengthening is loyalty and obedience), worked very well.

There are many benefits from boot camp. It was tons of fun for both of us and it quenched his submissive craving. It really was a fantasy come true for him. Aside from the fun, in the end he became better trained to serve me and more loyal to me. The effects were immediate. The first few weeks after boot camp, Thomas was wrapped around my finger and doing everything possible to please me. His loyalty to me and desire to serve me was so strong! Over time that effect wore off and I needed to use the typical discipline and motivators to keep him in line but there were some definite changes with his attitude and and how he served me and did chores that became a permanent part of his being.

Boot Camp also helped me become a better dominant wife. The experience made me more comfortable being in control of Thomas and I think I emerged a little more tougher, confident, and in control of my husband. Finally, we grew closer as a couple through the experience. When you experience something together that is so intense and intimate you can't help but get to know each other better and feel closer. It is a wonderful feeling.

I hope you enjoyed the post and I sincerely hope that you can take something from this series and apply it to your relationship.


--MzKaylee


























Wednesday, October 2, 2019

Submissive Craving - Boot Camp

I saved this technique for last because it incorporates the concepts from my last two posts (fantasy days and power trips). Also, it is a more extreme approach. Women new to WLM may not be ready for something this extreme (but it's really not that extreme :). I'm sure there are many beginners whose dominance comes naturally or who are very comfortable in their sexuality and being dominant. If you fit into this category, then Boot Camp is a great way to kick start the WLM and establish the rules of the marriage going forward. In a growing WLM, Boot Camp can be used to elevate his obedience and servitude to a higher level. For example, perhaps you've reached a point where you are ready to kick things up a notch and have him take on more chores or you are ready to incorporate additional rules and expectations for him,  Boot Camp is a fun and effective method for taking your relationship to that next level. Finally, if you are in a mature WLM, then Boot Camp can be used to re-energize the WLM or whip your husband back into shape if he has started to slack off or has gotten too comfortable in the submissive role. Celebrating your wedding anniversary with a boot camp is also fun to do.

When you hear the term Boot Camp, you're probably thinking about military boot camp or if you are a fitness buff. maybe a fitness boot camp comes to mind. Boot Camp is associated with things like intense training, rigid structure, high expectations, and toughness. I always envision a drill sergeant giving orders and pushing trainees to their limits. When it comes to boot camp for your husband these same concepts apply. The idea is to put your husband through strict and intense domination and training over a period of several days.

While a military boot camp is tough, intense, and challenging to endure it is a positive experience because the recruits emerge physically and emotionally stronger and well trained. Likewise I want my boot camp to be both tough and a positive experience for my husband. My goals are to train him to serve and obey me exactly the way I want, strengthen his submission and devotion to me, and to quench his submissive craving. Boot camp is a fun way to do this. Trust me, boot camp is a fantasy come true for submissive men.

Before I go further into describing Boot Camp, I want to provide a little perspective into the wisdom I am about to pass on. I have only done Boot Camp with my husband twice. The first time it was pretty basic and mostly focused on me training him to do chores. I told him we were going to spend the weekend doing training. It was early in our WLM so I was still learning the ropes. The term Boot Camp did not come up until after it was over. Whenever we referred back to the training session we called it the Boot Camp weekend. The second time was many years later when I was a seasoned dominant wife and more comfortable in my role. I planned out several days of Boot Camp with the intent of improving his service to me and also blowing his mind with intense dominance and control. What I describe below is based on the second session because it is a much more comprehensive approach,  By no means do you need to do it all. Pick and choose what works for you based on where you are in your WLM.

There are many ways you can structure boot camp and endless activities you can incorporate into the training. They key is to keep your days structured and to elevate your dominance and expectations to extreme fantasy levels. For Boot Camp, I wanted get my husband to the point where he was obeying and waiting for the next order or task and not thinking on his own. I structured it into three phases. Phase 1 was to set the strict tone for the training and "break him down" to that point where he is just listening and obeying, phase 2 was intense training, and phase 3 was bringing him back to reality and strengthening his loyalty and obedience.

Pre-Boot Camp
There is prep work for him. Boot Camp will start Thursday after work and will last until Sunday. We will both take vacation days from work on Friday. At the beginning of the week I give him instructions that he is to make no plans Thursday - Sunday and that by Thursday he must make a list of all the current rules he is expected to follow and all chores and tasks that he is expected to do. I let him know that he will be punished for every rule or tasks that he forgets to include. I will use this list during boot camp. I also tell him that he must shave his genitals Wed night so he is nice and smooth for me and I want him to get a fresh clean haircut prior to training. Finally, I give him a mantra to memorize. I let him know that he is expected to recite it on command. I don't recall the exact mantra I used but it included things like he worships me and promises to obey me and serve me always.

PHASE I: BREAKING HIM DOWN

Thursday
I lay out work clothes for him to wear along with thong panties and a cock strap. I leave a note that I expect him home by 5pm. He is not to be late. If he is late, regardless of the reason, he will be punished. For him to be home by 5pm he has to leave work early. If he has meetings in the afternoon he will have to reschedule them. If he can not, then he must suffer my consequences of being late. If he is late because of traffic, too bad! This is a no excuse policy. This tough stance is designed to start setting the tone for the next few days and get his mind into submissive mode.

He arrives before 5pm and I am waiting for him in my latex mini dress, heels, and my hair pulled back. This look adds to the dominant tone and immediately shifts his mind into submission. I can see the results immediately in his body language and the bulge in his pants. He is so easy! I order him to strip in the living room. I even take his wedding ring from him and let him know that for the next few days he is nothing but a slave to me and will have to work to earn back the privilege of being my submissive husband.

Next, I have him stand naked in the middle of the room for an inspection. Before the inspection begins, I attach leather cuffs to his wrists and ankles and put a collar around his neck. I start the inspection by tracing my hands all over his body and circling him slowly while I view my property. He is not allowed to speak during this. There is a lot of groping by me and I pinch his nipples. It's basically me enjoying my property while I make comments like, "my property." "you belong to me," and "so nice." I also order him to do things like spread his legs wider (I'll firmly kick his foot outward when ordering this), put his hands behind his head, hold his arms out, and bend over. During the inspection most things are good but I point out a few areas that need improvement such as trimming his nails and eyebrows. I note these on my punishment list and then retrieve my riding crop. While he is still in position with his hands behind his head, I give him a few firm swats on his ass and make him promise to take care of the things I pointed out that need improvement. I then place the crop under his balls and gently rub them with the crop. I tell him I am pleased at how smooth his balls are but that I notice a few hairs. I give his balls a few light taps with the riding crop and tell him he needs to take care of that before he goes to bed. "Yes Goddess," he replies. Finally, I command him to recite the mantra the he has memorized. He is able to do it but he stumbles a bit and misses a few words. I give him a several swats with the riding crop and tell him he needs to improve. I expect him to recite it exactly as written, without hesitation, and with enthusiasm. I want the words to flow naturally and not as if he is reciting something he just memorized. He will achieve that before the end of Boot Camp. No excuses.

With my inspection over, I go over a few rules for the next couple of days. Some of the rules he already knows but since it's boot camp, I re-state them to remind him of my authority over him. I begin to lightly stroke his cock with the riding crop as I give the first rule, "no cumming without my permission...and I don't plan to give permission anytime soon. Understood?" He responds with a "Yes Goddess." My second rule is that during training over the next few days he must always respond to all orders and commands from me with "Yes Goddess, I exist to obey you."  It's a little over the top but that's what boot camp is all about.  Out of habit he responds with "Yes Goddess" and he immediately gets a hard swat of the riding crop and I firmly correct him, "Yes Goddess, I exist to serve you." He starts to apologize and I spank him again and repeat "Yes Goddess I exist to serve you." He finally wises up and just repeat those words. I acknowledge his response by saying, "Those are the only words you need to say," Then I give the next rule, "you will not speak at all unless I ask you a direct question or I give permission or you are acknowledging my orders and commands."

I go through a few more rules with him while I slowly circle his body and trace the crop over his ass, cock, and balls, giving a few slaps and spanks here and there. My tone is firm and authoritative. I purposely look for things to correct him on as we go through this exercise. His is not standing straight enough, he is not speaking loud enough, he needs to respond with more enthusiasm, etc. I do this purposely so that he is feeling my power and authority and does not have time to think for himself. I want him in the mindset of just obeying every command I throw at him.  The effect on him is noticeable. He is fully aroused, submissive, and ready to obey. I can tell he his having a difficult time listening as the pleasure and submissive feelings wash over him. He is exactly in the mindset I want him to be in.

I am also in different mindset at this point. I am aroused and feeling the power. I sit on the couch, spread my legs and order him get on his knees and to orally pleasure me. I am very forceful and dominant with him while he pleasures me. When I have had enough. I forcefully push him away and tell him I am done with him. He is breathless. I love it! While I recover from my orgasm, I order him to remove my heels and then he kneels before me while I order takeout dinner.

I decide to have Thomas pick up the dinner rather than have it delivered. This will give me a few minutes alone to collect my thoughts for the rest of the evening. I remove his collar and cuffs and have him wear a butt plug, cock strap, and panties under his clothes. I pick out a t-shirt and gym shorts for him to wear. For the next few days he will have no choice in what he wears. I will pick out everything. I let Thomas know that during Boot Camp he is to always be in a collar and cuffs when in the house and whenever we leave the house he is to always have a butt plug in. The routine will be that when we leave the house he will insert the plug, put on the cock strap, and then wait for me by the door. I will remove his collar and cuffs. When we return to the house, he will immediately strip naked and stand facing the wall next to the door and wait for me to re-collar and cuff him. He is not permitted to go any further into the house until this happens. Then he can remove and clean the butt plug and cock strap.

When Thomas returns with the food and he is naked and cuffed again, I order him to set the table just for me and prepare my plate. He will be serving me and not eating with me. I have him stand at attention next to the table while I eat. On command he fetches me drinks, cuts my food, and refills food on my plate. I take many opportunities to fondle and tease him while he serves me. In between commands he stands quietly at attention and listens to me talk about how good the food is and how much I am enjoying him serve me. After awhile I allow him to kneel next to me and I feed him some of the food every now and then. I must confess, feeding him while he knelt beside me was quite erotic and a big turn on.

After dinner he cleans up while I relax on the couch and watch TV. Then he is off to run me a bath.  He bathes me, massages me and then pleasures me again before bed. Our first night of Boot Camp is over and he is broken down and in complete submissive mode and I am feeling very much in control.

TO BE CONTINUED.......



Monday, September 2, 2019

Submissive Craving - Power Trips

There are many things I do that send a clear message to my husband that I have authority over him. In this post, I'll refer to these actions as Power Trips. I think that's a fitting description since it is about me wielding my power over my husband. Power Trips come in many forms. It can be firm orders commanding him to do something, a demanding discipline session, a harsh punishment, aggressive sexual play, or fantasy play where I tease at how I own him and that he must obey me.

Sometimes a Power Trip is done with serious purposeful intentions. For example, if I feel Thomas is slacking off in his chores or becoming lazy, I may take a strict and serious tone with him and order him to immediately address the issues. I may take it further and point out small little things that need to be improved with his chores and I may even add a few additional tasks that I want him to do in the next day or two. The benefit of a WLM is that I can spout out orders and not have to worry about him arguing. He obeys without question. This is a bit of an extreme approach and it is purposely done to to correct his laziness and improve his behavior. It also serves a dual purpose of quenching his submissive craving, Yes, believe or not, submissive men enjoy and desire this tough and demanding approach. Thomas always gets an erection when I do this.

I also use Power Trips to remind him of my authority over him, which of course brings out his deep submissive nature. My fellow Goddess wives, if you want to try something fun, plan out a day for your husband and then tell him in a very direct and commanding tone what he is going to do for the day. The key is to be commanding and not ask or be polite. It could go something like this, "Thomas, I have a few things that need to be returned to Kohls. After breakfast you will return them for me and then you will pick up a few things at the supermarket for me. Once you get home, you will do all your chores before dinner. After dinner plan on running me a bath and I expect a massage afterward."

It is fun for me to hit Thomas with demands like that out of the blue. The instant change in his demeanor when I do this is exciting to watch. He gets excited, submissive, and aroused all at once. He becomes an instant loyal slave who can not wait to serve me and his submissive craving is being fed by me. I am still amazed at how simply changing my tone and attitude can have such an impact on Thomas. Ladies, if you have not done this with your submissive husband, you must give it a try. You will not be disappointed.

Last week I peeked into the living room to make sure Thomas was not sitting in my chair. He was not, but I let him know that I was checking on him. Doing little things like that to make sure he knows you are enforcing rules is another purposeful power trip that keeps him on his toes.

Then there are the Power Trips that are more fun and fantasy but also remind him of his place beneath me. When he is begging to cum, I may tell him how weak he is. I enjoy teasing his cock to the brink of orgasm over and over again, while telling him things like I own him, I love that he is my slave,  and that he needs to obey me and please me if ever wants to orgasm again. One of the biggest Power Trips is to tease him until he begs for orgasm and then tell him 'no.' When we first started our WLM it was fun to do this but it was not easy being tough. I would often give in. In fact, years later Thomas would admit that I was somewhat predictable when I would allow an orgasm. That predictability went away once I got my feet wet in WLM and learned that being denied orgasm is actually a rush for him, I became very good at denying him and I now enjoy having that power over him and I also get a rush from it. It is so much fun for both of us when I get him all worked up and then have him pleasure me to an orgasm but he gets none. Thomas can no longer predict when I will allow him an orgasm. Sometimes he goes months and sometimes he goes weeks and every now and then he might get one within a few days. I absolutely love teasing him like that and he loves the mind fuck from it all.

Another fun Power Trip is to take complete control during sex and be very dominant and aggressive with him.The queening position is great for this or having him kneel and perform oral on me. In the past year I've become much more aggressive with him during oral sex, squeezing my thighs tight around his head or pushing his head into me. Let's just say he's been having a hard time breathing down there. :). What's crazy is that the more breathless he is, the more aroused he gets. I must confess, oral sex has gotten hotter with us in the last few months.

Sometimes during sex (I am on top), I order him to remain still and not thrust. He is supposed to always remain still during sex or while I tease him unless I tell him otherwise. He is pretty good at following this rule but sometimes his natural instincts kick in and he starts to thrust. I will allow it on occasion if it is feeling good for me but others times I will reprimand him and tell him to remain still. Even when he is still, it is fun to order him not to thrust just to reinforce my authority over him. Whenever I give the order to not thrust or for him to remain still, something changes in him. His arousal suddenly spikes and it becomes harder for him to repress his orgasm. Another great mind fuck just by saying a few words!!

Power Trips are a lot of fun for me but also drive him wild and help to appease his submissive craving. As you become experienced in WLM, you'll find that often times you'll naturally go into Power Trip mode or sometimes it will be a spontaneous activity. It is also fun to plan a fantasy Power Trip every now then to spice things up and to remind him of his proper place beneath you. If you are a woman who is new to WLM, planning frequent Power Trips is a must! It is a great way for you to get comfortable in the dominant role while having fun.

I would love to hear what Power Trips you have all experienced and what are your favorites.

-Mz Kaylee.

Saturday, August 24, 2019

Submissive Craving - Fantasy Days

Engaging in my husband's submissive fantasies on occasion and focusing on his fetishes is one way that I feed his craving. If you are new to Wife Led Marriage (WLM) or femdom, fantasy play is a great way to dip your feet into this new wonderful world and start to experiment with your husband's submission and your dominance over him. When a couple is embarking on a WLM, there is often a large imbalance between the husband's craving for being controlled and the amount of time the wife exerts control over him. His craving is much bigger and more intense than what she can give. A large part of this is usually attributed to her not understanding what to do or not being comfortable in the dominant role. Fantasy play is a great way to start bridging that gap.

In the beginning of my WLM, we planned monthly fantasy days. They helped me get comfortable in the dominant role and helped me understand his submission. There was very little domination that occurred in between fantasy days.  I was just not prepared to engage fully in the lifestyle at that time. However, over time, as I became more comfortable and confident with being dominant and as I learned more about the dynamics of his submission, I began to exert control over him outside of the fantasy days and I began to incorporate rules and expectations for him into our daily life. It was a slow and gradual change but eventually (after many years) the monthly fantasy days faded away because we had transitioned into a WLM lifestyle. For couples new to the lifestyle or who are struggling to keep it going, I recommend this approach. Guys, for you, this approach can be a compromise  if your wife is not engaging in the lifestyle. This is one of those times when you need to adjust your expectations and accept that domination will occur only during the fantasy times and really enjoy and savor those moments and not pester her about wanting more.

Although monthly fantasy days have faded away in my WLM, we still engage in fantasy days. They are just less frequent. Fantasy play still has a place in a mature WLM. Even a WLM can grow mundane over time. Fantasy days are a way to spice things up. A WLM is not meant to be all serious. Fantasy and fun are great ingredients for any marriage. I find that when I let loose and play into his fantasies and fetishes, it strengthens his submission to me and brings us closer together as a couple. When you engage in his wildest fantasies, he often experiences new levels of pleasure and thrills. If you have a strong intimate bond with your partner, like my husband and I do, it is easy to trust each other and completely let go of your inhibitions. The result is deeply fulfilling and intimate fantasy play that brings you closer together. It is almost spiritual.  I have heard others in a WLM, including some of you who read my blog, describe the same type of closeness after experiencing and intense fantasy or domination session.

It is very easy to engage in a fantasy day. I know my husband well so figuring out what to do is not hard. For me the hard part is getting into the right mood. It is easy to get caught up in day-to-day life and not take time out for fantasy fun. That is why it is good to plan a few of these each year.  Once I focus on it, I get in the mood quickly and it is fun and exciting for me too!  There are also times when fantasy play is spontaneous. If the mood strikes you at anytime, go for it!

If you are in a newer relationship or just starting the journey of WLM, just ask your husband about his fantasies. A word of advice is to continually ask about his fantasies over time. Often times men are embarrassed about some of their fantasies and therefore do not disclose all of them to you initially. As your relationship grows and your husband gets more comfortable expressing his fantasies to you, he will open up more.  Also, over time a man's fantasies may change so it's good to revisit fantasies. Another technique for drawing out his fantasies is to ask about them when he is horny. A horny man will open up more about his sexual desires. I find it very amusing and fun to tease my husband's cock while I ask about his fantasies. Keep probing deeper and deeper the more he talks and you will learn a lot. You can also ask leading questions such as, "do you enjoy being tied up," or "would you let me spank you?" I've discovered that the more horny my husband is and the longer he is kept in a horny state, the more bizarre his confessions become. lol! I don't get freaked out over it. Men do not think straight once their hormones run wild.

Once you know his fantasies, it is up to you to choose which ones to engage in. You have no obligation to engage in any particular fantasy of his. One of my husband's top fantasies is a three-some where he is submissive to myself and another women.  That's not going to happen. There are many other that I will not do. Some of the things that I will do which he loves include putting on fetish wear, turning into strict dominatrix, spanking, inspecting his body and queening him. I've also put a collar and leash on him and led him around the house like my pet. It really is fun when you get into it! Often time I will play into his feminization desires by taking him shopping for panties, making him dress in stockings, or planning a "girls night out" with just him and I, Some of these things I may do on a typical day and not as part of a fantasy. What makes fantasy days different is that it is a day where I focus solely on his fantasy or fetish and take it to a more extreme level.  It is pure fantasy and fun and not meant to be real.

Fantasy days are a lot of fun for both of us. In fact, I usually turn them into fantasy weekends and sometimes I extend some of the fantasy even longer. For example, earlier in our WLM, the only time I had Thomas wear panties was when we did fantasy play. Sometimes when the fantasy was over, I would tell Thomas that he still had to wear panties for the next week.  And to think, now he wears panties 24/7!  That's a good example of how our fantasy play transitioned into real life.

I enjoy doing fantasy days for my husband and I also benefit from them. As I wrote above, we bond during fantasy days. I also notice a stronger sense of loyalty and devotion to me in the weeks following a fantasy day. I can tell that he is happy grateful that I entertain his fantasies every now and then, I guess it's one way to ensure I remain the girl of his dreams :).

-Mz Kaylee





Wednesday, August 7, 2019

Submissive Craving - Part 2

In part 1 of this post, I wrote about how strong the submissive craving is in men. The many comments logged in part 1 validates that what I wrote about is real. Thanks to those of you who contributed and provided input. I enjoyed seeing that there was also discussions within the comments among a few of you. The discussion and sharing of experiences is helpful for all of us to learn and be encouraged in our WLM journey. If you have not read the comments in part 1 or contributed to the discussion, I encourage you to do so.

What I learned from your comments is that the craving for many of you is strong, occurring daily and even multiple times in a day. This is believable to me because it is no secret that men often fantasize or think about sex/woman multiple times a day. There were a few comments on how the desire to submit started at a very early age and that it is wired into your thinking. I have heard this before from men and my husband has also confessed that he had fantasies and desires of being dominated even before puberty. Many of you talked about feeling more balanced in your life and focused on your wife when you are under her control. It is a wonderful benefit of the WLM lifestyle.

A few of you noted that this craving is not something that you can repress. I believe you and I sense that it takes a lot of self-control to keep it from becoming obsessive. It is important for women to understand this. It is not healthy for men to repress these feelings and it is destructive for the relationship if the husband is struggling internally with these feelings and not able to open up to his wife about them.

On the flip side, submissive men need to manage this craving. If you can not manage it then it becomes destructive. Guys, sometimes you need to just live in the moment and appreciate what your wife is giving you. I often see a guy post a sob story about how his wife does not dominate him but then in subsequent posts or if you read historical posts you find out that he's locked in chastity and gets spanked and so on. He does not appreciate that his wife really is dominating him and that there are thousands of guys who dream of being in his situation. The issue is that the craving is so much that submissive guys always wants more and more and when that happens, you can never be happy. I am speaking in generalizations of course. I know not all of you think that way but I am sure that many of you can relate. Those of you who learn to control it, find happiness and fulfillment and those who can't will never be satisfied.

Guys, you also need to understand that most women do not crave domination in the same way that you crave submission. Some do and if you find a woman that does, then you've hit the submissive lottery. I am not one of those women. While I have embraced his submission and enjoy it, at times I find my husband's deep submissive desires to be annoying and trust me there are lots of things he wants me to do that I will not. Over the years he has learned to manage his craving and appreciate what he has instead of always wanting more. He has learned to change his expectations for the things he knows I will not do. It does not mean he does not fantasize about them or does not still have hope that one day things could change.  Even I have learned to never say "never". There are things I do today that I would never have imagined doing several years ago.  However, my husband has learned to not have high hopes about those things happening in the near future (at least I think he has :). By resetting your expectations, you can enjoy and savor the things that are happening now and find pleasure in them.

Of course I know the craving is not easy to control and as I wrote earlier, it is not good to completely repress it. The more the husband and wife can embrace it together at a healthy and sustainable level, the happier and more fulfilling the relationship will become. Even in a mature WLM, where dominance and submission has become a natural way of life, the craving for more still surfaces. Just like a traditional marriage, over time the spice in the relationship can fade away. In my last post I mentioned three things that I often do to keep that from happening: Fantasy Days, Boot Camp Training, and Power Trips.  I will write about those in my next post. Until then, please continue to share your thoughts and experiences on the topic.

-Mz Kaylee.




Monday, July 22, 2019

1 Million Views!

I just noticed that my blog reached 1million+ views. In today's world that's probably not much but it's an exciting milestone for me. Thank you all for reading my posts and for the great comments and discussions!! 

-Kaylee