Glow (Chris)

1. Who am I (name, sex, approx. age, where you live)
Chris (aka Glow)
male, just 50, Europe, North-Germany

2. My position in the relationship (submissive, dominant, or switch? If switch, do you favor one
over the other?

In the course of my/our life a switcher. But due to the inclination of my wife meanwhile fixed on
submissive. I suspect my status as sadistic submissive - a somewhat unfortunate orientation ;-)
Whereby my sadistic streak towards my wife must not be lived out any more...

3. What is your current marriage status and WLM/FLR situation (Married and in a WLM, not
married and in a FLR, not married but seeking a FLR, etc.)? What is status of your WLM

(Beginners, Mature, Somewhere in the middle)
Together with my sandbox love for 31 years and married for 22 years.
In 2017 on our 20th wedding anniversary I swore to honor, protect and serve her for all eternity.
So a WLM with extended rookie status, I would think.

4. When did you first discover your submissive/dominant desires?

With the puberty. Indefinable feelings. In other words, they've always been there. Especially those of
subservience. It always had a special thrill...

5. Describe how WLM/FLR was introduced into your relationship? Explain your experiences of
how you went from discovering submission/domination up to the point of being in a WLM/FLR?

We have been experimenting for about 20 years. At first, everyone was equally dominant for a weekend
and then submissive for a weekend. In Germany we call that "wearing the pants". This was then changed to a weekly rhythm. But always in the days when I was dominant, my wife's self-confidence suffered. To understand this we needed nearby 10 years. So we decided to change the relationship of the times. So she got more and more dominant days in her favour. Until basically there were only dominant days left for her. In 2012 i started reading FLR articles on the web and providing her with excerpts. Nice feeling to give it a name and see that we were not alone. In 2016 we finally discussed our further living together and in 2017 i gave her my vow for our wedding day.

6. Describe your current WLM/FLR situation

a. Chores Apart from buying food, i do all the household chores if the job situation allows. i'm a
civil engineer and work full-time. There's sometimes not enough time. Then she helps out.
That's then really uncomfortable for me. Cooking is still with her because she just loves to cook. Making the kitchen ok again is my job.

b. Finances/Money For security and tax reasons we still have 2 account systems. However, she has all
codes and pins. So I can neither make a bank transfer nor can I get cash without her
knowing about it. All costs, insurance and savings contributions go from (my) account. A weekly
allowance of 20 Euros is mine. Bills and insurance are my responsibility.Only by appointment and permission. The same goes for our Asset- and Savings-Accounts, all in her name. For emergency cases I have a debitcard with a limit of about 100 euro. Thats it. She really enjoys being in control of this area and i am has to involve her in every little thing and ask for permission. The curious thing is, that I worked as a financial consultant for 13 years. So she takes proper advice from me and then makes her own decisions about our finances. It's kind of hard from time to time but for me absolutely insane feeling of her control.

c. Rules/Protocols She has the last word in every affair. I shall answer all requests and questions with a
"yes, ma'am". That's all the rules we need right now...

d. Punishment and Discipline Punishment! A delicate subject because I am of the opinion that it would give me a pagan respect for her. She already hit me and I found it scary. I'm absolutely not a masochist. In my case it would be a real punishment. But she doesn't think much of the fact of beating her husband. Time will tell. Punishment is available but not practicable due to the fact that our son is living at home again after a motorcycle accident.

e. Chastity/Orgasm Contro She's been deciding whether I have an orgasm for at least six or seven years.I don't wear a chastity belt but she explained to me about three years ago that breaking this rule with masturbation would be the same as cheating. So she has control over my/our sex life.

f. Rituals, Protocols, routines I'd say putting her coffee to bed in the morning is already a ritual with us. With the coffee in her bed, I am allowed to lie down with her for about 20 minutes and get cuddled. She mentioned that this is a pleasant start into the day for her. In the evening i am allowed to take off her shoes and dresses when we go to bed. Note: She almost always wears high heels at home :-)
After taking off her clothes I am allowed to say every evening: I love you and for me you
are the greatest woman in the world. I am infinitely grateful to you for letting me serve
you. Knocking when she is in the bathroom. Opening doors, avoiding her, helping her into
her jacket/coat, serving her drinks etc. are probably not rituals but a matter of course.
I would like to see more protocols, but she is a belly person and finds such things
exhausting.

g. Fetishes or kinks My biggest fetishes are probably legs in high heels. She plays these out mercilessly. i love her for that. Her high-heels collection is extensive. We tried Bondage or SM, but the spark did not fly. Other than that there are no kinks or fetishes.

7. How public is your WLM/FLR – do others know about it? How do you act in public?

Our son knows the rough-and-ready. We can tell by the fact that when he makes
important decisions he asks his mother where he would have asked me earlier. It s ok for me.
On the other hand, I often draw my son to my side as an ally. He tries to influence his
mother not to be so hard on me. Sometimes it is really funny. Some friends of ours know about the fact that we always had special arrangements. So they more or less know about it. In public, we try to keep things discreet to avoid provocation. Whereby my wife meanwhile tends to think that she doesn't care in public when others see that she is in charge. In other words, she expects me to be polite and courteous in public.

8. Do you have kids in the house? If yes, what age group (infant, toddler, teenager, adult)

A son. A teenager on the verge of adulthood. 20 years old. Had a serious motorcycle
accident in October 2019 and has only been out of hospital since April this year. Until the end of
this year he is forced to use crutches or a wheelchair.Therefore he is currently living with us
again, so we can care for him and support him. This does not make things easy at the moment. Especially not for my wife.

9. Describe how the WLM/FLR works with kids in the house

First, my wife approached him about three years ago and explained to him that we had
a kind of agreement regarding our relationship. He then looked very carefully and understood that I do more in the household. We then had a father/son conversation in which I explained to him that I was fine with taking care of his mother a little more. He also accepted this fully. After his return due
to the accident I explained further that his mother wanted to be taken more seriously by me and
I made her the offer to confirm everything with Ma'm like in the american army. In the meantime he enjoys raising his mother with it and also talks to her like this from time to time. So we try to deal with the topic openly and not to influence him in his development. On the other hand, we have become so selfish that we don't want to give up this kind of relationship anymore. So, why hide?

10. What are some of challenges you face in your WLM/FLR?

A very big challenge is her motivation for everything. For example in sports, to put a shovel
on top of it, to take more weight, go the extra mile or to go out again in the evening etc. I was always the initiator, the locomotive and source of ideas of both of us. Since we live FLR in our relationship, she denies many things. She has simply become a bit more comfortable. Too comfortable for my taste. And for hers to. We have both recognized the problem, but have no solution at hand. Another big problem is my motivation to serve! She is a vanilla without sadistic or dominant tendencies. Of course she enjoys being courted and served. Which normal wife gets her feet creamed and massaged almost every evening? No matter. I work full time and do her the complete household besides other tasks. But there is hardly a word of praise or a request from her. She sets small standards. This demotivates me
considerably. Sometimes it is very difficult. Then questions arise in my head like, "why are you
doing all this at all" And you wouldn't believe how many texts I translated from English into German. Two complete books are also among them. .In my opinion, these are the two main problems. Among the many little theatres of secondary warfare... ;-) On the other hand, I just love this woman. We're perfect for each other on so many levels. Both sporty with the same interests or sports. We run together, we go mountain biking together, we train fitness together. When it comes to politics, moral, money or raising children, there is not a hair between us. Only the FLR aspect causes problems.

11. What things do you like the most about your WLM/FLR?
So much. Starting with the incredible closeness, which after 31 years of relationship is
greater than ever before. I'm amazed at how big my need to see her happy has become. At the same time I am amazed again and again how intense my desire to serve her has become. In 2017 - we had already been together for 29 years - I was as much in love with her as I was at 19 when we met.

12. How have things evolved or changed with you and as a couple in your WLM/FLR over time
since starting the WLM/FLR? How does this compare to how you were prior to the WLM/FLR?

They are subliminal changes. Yesterday we were on a 45-kilometer time-biking tour. Wherever we could ride side by side, I noticed that I now find it more correct if she rides slightly offset in front of me. I feel more comfortable then. Reporting this to her, she noticed that she feels the same way now, so she prefers to ride in front. It has become a matter of course for her that I carry her sports bag from the gym.That I transport and sort the shopping into the house. That I await her in the front door and greet her lovingly when she comes home from work later. The other day I was busy behind the house and
missed her arrival. The very same evening she told me that it really disturbed her. In the meantime, i no longer go to her portmoney without being asked. that was 20 years different. we were equal. that has changed. Especially since she still thinks of my things as hers. I have become more attentive and try to sense her needs. When is a blanket or a warming pad desired. (Yes it s getting cold in good old Europe! Most in Winter...) Make her offers of drinks or candy and so on.

13. If there were one or two things you could change about your WLM/FLR or one or two things
new you would like to try, what would they be?

I would like to try to have more respect for her. I have been teasing and teasing her for 20
years (little sadistic i am) and she is well trained to endure it. Since 2017 she has been
stopping a lot of things but there is still a lack of respect for her. I could imagine that punishment
would improve this situation. Furthermore, we would both like to meet other couples who live a similar relationship model. Every couple is different and individual. It must be very interesting to exchange views on these issues.

14. Do you have any advice for others who are starting out in a WLM/FLR?

It only works through conversation. And there's no shying away from it. Says, it takes
time. In Germany there is a saying: What long would be good is finally good

15. Is there anything else you what like to share?

Yes, an idea or a solution to our problem under point 10, Her Motivation, would be
absolutely fantastic. I would also like to apologize for my English. This is so bad by nature that I had to use translation software. For me, my text sounds a bit bumpy in places. a sincere apology for this. At the same time I would like to express my thanks for this excellent blog and the
exchange that is possible through it. Mz Kaylee my deepest thanks from europe.

With cheerful greetings across the big pond
glow

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