Saturday, November 28, 2020

The Cheese (Guest post by John Dalton)

Please enjoy this guest post by John Dalton. In his post John formulates several opinions, drawing on his personal experiences with WLM. I appreciate his well thought out post and I look forward to the ensuing discussion from all of you. -Mz Kaylee

I am sure most readers of this blog are men longing for female authority in their life. Some would disagree but I am convinced that all men are born with this desire but it takes time and experience with the right woman to come to terms with this need. Unfortunately, due mostly to socialization and the general nature of women it is very unlikely that a women will ever consider dominance as a means to attract the attention of men . This is very unfortunate as a dominant presence is much more effective than all the typical adornments that women apply in their efforts to attract male attention. 

As enlightened men, we often look for ways to entice the women  in our lives to become more dominant. This may work for a moment but we forget that women are very intuitive and quickly see that the cheese is part of the trap . Typically the “ cheese “ in most new Female Led relationships seems to start out with the man taking on more household duties and allowing the woman to have more time to luxuriate in her new found place of authority. The energy of this dynamic usually  fades over time because the cheese comes with a whole new list of responsibilities to fulfill his desire for submission. She may not be scrubbing the floors now but she is still serving his needs and desires . 

It is my opinion that the paradigm shift that Mz Kaylee so eloquently describes is like an awaking or new perspective that occurs at the core of the relationship. As the woman matures and truly understands the empowering concepts of a WLM/FLR she begins to relax in her authority and channel the energy away from his desires to hers. Odd as it may seem, most men experience their own paradigm shift at this point and find the terms of the new relationship even more fulfilling. The fantasy play of the past is replaced with an application of authority and direction that serves her desires and  actually adds practical value to her daily life. The cheese is now on a silver platter and elegantly served according to her desires.

If we look deeper into the elements of this change I believe many women and therefore couples often abandon the concept of a WLM at the edge of the paradigm shift. The unknown of the abyss is scary because intuitively she knows that there can be no return to the traditional concepts of marriage. Everything she values in love and relationship is on the line  with only a promise of a new beginning that is counter to everything she has been taught.

It is at this juncture, a place she has likely retreated from many times before, that she realizes that there is no return to the normalcy of a traditional relationship. The experiences and vivid memories of what she thought was only  sexual  play have become part of their intimate bond and cannot be undone. His deep and before hidden desires of submission have been laid bare while she has experienced the often confusing but very real effects of power and control  in the relationship. All pretense of equality is gone as she realizes that her authority goes far beyond play. Her fear and instincts tell her to run but the door is closed to the patriarchal ways of the past. Whether chosen or sought , the paradigm shift has become real for both. He is no longer a husband but rather a willing and dedicated  servant to the woman he cherishes. If he expects to be her lover he will have to earn that privilege daily. She has become all powerful and has forever put aside any ideas of service to her husband. The  privileges of an empowered woman are likely far from her visions of love and marriage but in some mysterious way it seems like she has come home to a truth she has always known. Her confidence grows as she begins to understand that her power is no longer given and therefore cannot be taken away. His submission to her is still a choice  but his love and desire for her is now ten fold . His source of happiness and contentment are found in service to her. This is an age old concept that is found in virtually every part of our  marriage culture but remains taboo in the traditional sense of relationship . Men are only allowed to give service to their wife as part of the “ happy wife , happy life “ excuse .

I believe the paradigm shift is part of a life changing transformation that goes beyond the confines of the relationship. Younger women with less socialization to the concepts of a patriarchal society find this transition much less difficult while older women struggle and may never find the courage or even desire to complete the transition. I was encouraged to write this post after reading lady Di’s comments about her struggles as she approaches the paradigm shif . I think all women experience the same issues and are confused as they approach the cross over point. She may be convinced that a FLR/WLM is truly the way forward  but in real life it  still remains awkward and challenging . I would liken this to a Women that suddenly realizes that she has won a trip to England . This has always been a dream ! She is filled with excitement  until she finds the voucher for her car rental. Her dream vacation turns into a nightmare as she considers driving in strange places on the wrong side of the road! England sounds beautiful but not if she has to drive! 

Power in the relationship might have been something that she struggled to obtain but not something that she ever imagined would be laid at her feet. The struggle for power and control is something all couples deal with in marriage and relationships. The paradigm shift enables her to approach problems and challenges from a new perspective .The dominance of play becomes part of her demeanor as she  realizes that a dominant presence has  value in everyday life . Like the afore mentioned woman that won the trip to England , the fear and dread  of driving fades as she considers that there are hundreds of  handsome young men living in England that would find great privilege in driving her around the city! As an empowered woman the solution is there but she has to overcome the meekness and fear that comes with change.

The point of my rambling is to encourage women to boldly embrace the paradigm shift. The man that introduced her to this lifestyle may initially reject the new and powerful woman she has become but his rebellion will quickly fade as his submissive desires take control . Like her ,he will experience the paradigm shift as he falls deeply into a submission that is complete and is no longer based on his fantasy but rather the fulfillment of her desires . This can be  a very contentious point in the transition and not a place couples should linger. The woman must establish her place of authority with  straightforward changes that move the relationship away from the sexual play of dominance to real life demands and expectations. Going back to lady Di’s comments , it is not the application of more dominant sexual play that will raise his commitment to the principles of a WLM/FLR but rather the maturing of her authority that is presented with an unyielding  expectation of obedience and adoration. If he chooses to be disobedience than he will do so at the loss of fulfilling his most urgent need of submission . The threat of loosing her or at the minimum  a return to the principles of a vanilla relationship will motivate him far more than new or harsher disciplines. I am not trying to suggest that dominant play should be removed from a mature FLR/WLM but as the paradigm shift occurs it should become an outward expression of her dominance rather than the foundation or means of her authority. Her power and control should no longer be based on role play and will not be contained to the confines of the relationship. As her confidence grows so will her dominant presence. Her life perspective will change as she realizes that as part of the paradigm shift, she is no longer the property of her husband but rather he has become her property. Seemingly a minor play on words but very powerful when acknowledged in the contents of marriage.

I often find that I have a deeper perspective into the principles of dominance and submission and tend to overthink the subject. I am truly intrigued by the WLM/FLR lifestyle and the amazing positive effects it can have on a relationship . I am certain my comments will be met with question especially from a pragmatic perspective. I hope to provoke positive thought and conversation that will motivate women to boldly approach the paradigm shift with the knowledge that what has already began cannot be undone.This is very heart felt subject and one that my wife and I have experienced. She has approached the paradigm shift many times over the years only to retreat back to the perceived security of a traditional relationship. Over time ,the reality, truth and happiness become hard to deny and  we find ourselves adapting to the principles of a WLM once again. It is my hope that someday we can mature and finally reach the other side. Either way, she is my only love and if we reach this goal it will be together.

Take care 

John Dalton 

Tuesday, November 24, 2020

2 Mllion Views!

Yesterday Femdom Think Tank reached 2 million all time views. It’s exciting to see so many people reading my posts. It is fantastic that there is an increasing interest in Wife Led Marriage/Female Led Relationships. Let’s face it, guys are happiest under the thumb of a woman and kneeling at her feet 😄.

Thank you all for reading and participating through discussion. The more we talk about it the more we learn and grow in our relationships and help others discover the greatness of WLM/FLR. Let's keep it going!

-Mz Kaylee

Thursday, November 19, 2020

Another Exception Allowed

Earlier this week, I allowed Thomas to pleasure me. In the midst of the pleasure he ended up on top of me and we had sex that way. This is not normal for us. He is not allowed on top during sex. He is not even allowed to thrust unless I tell him to, which is not often. Usually I use him like a sex toy for my pleasure. Having these rules is one of the many ways that I exert my control over him and enforce his submissive status in the relationship. He broke the rule by even trying to do it, but I allowed it. I was just in the mood for it. Perhaps he sensed that I wanted it and took his chances. Once he was inside of me, he knew I was allowing him a very special privilege. I think it excited him more, which made it more torturous for him because he was not allowed to cum. So there he was - on top and thrusting, something he's not used to doing anymore. If felt great and I had an incredible orgasm. He managed to do it all without having an orgasm but I know he did not want to stop and I know he wanted to orgasm bad. Instead I sent him to kneel in the corner for a few minutes to calm down. It is exciting to have that control over him and I know he loved being denied. As much as he wanted to orgasm, he got a greater thrill from being denied. I love it!

Exceptions to the rule are fine from time-to-time. Your WLM/FLR is not written in stone and so it is ok for the leader to bend the rules every now and then or change the rules. Notice that I said leaders. It's not ok for your subbies to bend rules - you get punished for bending the rules. Sorry, that's just how it works :). 

I had a feeling that I had wrote about this before and so I searched my blog and sure enough, I posted about this in Dec 2015.  I guess Thomas gets an exception to be on top every 5 years.

-Mz Kaylee

Monday, November 9, 2020

What things do you like the most about your Wife Led Marriage (WLM)/Female Led Relationship (FLR)?

As a reminder, you are welcome to submit a profile to be published on the blog so that others can learn about you and you can learn from others. Profiles are located in the menu on the right side of the blog main page. There is a template in the menu that you can use to submit your profile.  I have found the profiles to be full of great information and advice.  In this post, I share excerpts from the profiles on the question - What things do you like the most about your WLM/FLR? I will start with my response to the question. Enjoy!

No chores for me, no arguing from him, I give him an order and he responds immediately, no putting gas in my car, hot coffee served to me every morning, and I get to orgasm whenever I want....We have also grown very close together as a result of the WLM. We communicate with each other much more frequently and are more open about our feelings. I’ve always had a wonderful connection with my husband but the WLM significantly deepened the connection and intimacy with us.-Mz Kaylee

It helps me focus on the present and remove distractions  -Paul

I absolutely love the honouring and worshipping of my beloved wife.  It is an amazing level of joy for me to see her happy.  I also love that there is ZERO arguing…. I love the comfort and joy that comes from the level of respect that Mistress has for me in my role as her submissive/slave husband, and the strength and courage She feels that exists in me to allow her to be the only person on the planet that I would submit to.  -subhubphx

I’ve discovered I love being under a woman’s thumb, micromanaged, and strictly controlled.  Yes it’shard at times, but I absolutely love it. -Edward

The freedom and  the love he shows me everyday. -Pudsweda

I loved the fact that she had the chance to experience being the openly dominant one in our marriage before she left this world and I treasured having been her ‘traditional wife.’   -Tony

I am loved and cared for by a beautiful, powerful woman.  Growing up, I could never have imagined that. -Tommy

We are so in tune with each other and so much in love. Been married for over 20 years and it feels like we are newlyweds. The WLM most definitely is the reason for this. Our communication is so much better. We never have arguments. Although orgasms are infrequent for me, my sex life is off the charts – Joe D

So much. Starting with the incredible closeness, which after 31 years of relationship is greater than ever before. I'm amazed at how big my need to see her happy has become. At the same time I am amazed again and again how intense my desire to serve her has become. In 2017 - we had already been together for 29 years - I was as much in love with her as I was at 19 when we met  -Glow

I like having the final say on what movie we are going to watch and in the way we live our daily lives. I like that I get to decide how our relationship develops (the pace, the things we do or don’t do). I’m not good at asking others to do things for me, so I like that I am allowed to ask him to do things for me and I can ask him to give me sexual pleasure without feeling the need to reciprocate (this is difficult conditioning to reverse). I like that he gets pleasure from pleasing me. I like that I am allowed be my true self without apology (I’m still working on this). Lastly, and at first, surprisingly, I’m really liking the feeling of power I get from leading and controlling him. -Lady Di

I love our level of communication.  Since I told her my deepest secret upon meeting, there really has been nothing for me to hide from her.  I know she loves me deeply and that I can totally trust her.  She always cares about how I feel and always listens to me and then decides what is best for us and where she will lead us. -Sharlee

I love less fights. -Richard

We both get our needs met. When she hits my submissive buttons, I see my wife as a goddess. We are more close and loving now than before, if that was possible. -Gary

How I am treated and know that if I ask for something it is ok and I do not have to justify my wants/needs to anyone or feel fear to ask for something that some might say is selfish -Anne

She is much happier, and I am much happier too.  I feel like I am more in my “element” being surrendered and submissive to her.  Surrendering was key, telling her that I surrendered was humbling, yet very satisfying to me.   I love that our communication has improved 1000 %.  I love our weekly reviews, and after four years of doing them, if we skip a week, we both miss this specific time we spend together.  I love that my wife’s health has improved.  She is a very A Type personality, and since we have been on our Journey her sleep patterns have greatly improved along with other specific medical conditions that are typically attributed to A Types who internalize their stress.  Reducing her stress level has been joy to watch.  A better relationship, with better physical and mental health, has made for a better and enriched sex life. -Bob

 I think the things I like best are that I feel about her the way I felt when we were dating. Also you become very truthful with you wife, she doesn’t allow me to hide anything from her. -Alan

 Simply surrender and her being in control. The simplicity in some regards. -Mike


Sunday, November 8, 2020

Submissive Men and Chores

There were quite a few comments and questions about chores in the comments of the last post so I decided to write a post on chores. Doing chores is probably not something most guys think about when they are are first venturing into female domination and female led relationships or wife led marriages. I'd be willing to bet most guys in the beginning would actually want to avoid chores and instead are viewing their submission mostly in a sexual way and thinking more about being forced to be a sexual slave or being punished and humiliated. This seems to be the typical guy fantasy.  It is fine as a fantasy and if you have a woman who is willing to indulge in that fantasy over and over again, then that's great and your are one lucky guy.

However, the reality for most guys is that the only women who are going to strictly indulge in their sexual submissive fantasy on an ongoing basis, are the ones that require payment. There is no shortage of professional dominatrix or online mistresses that will satisfy those desires so long as you keep paying them. If you want a real sustainable FLR/WLM then you need to look beyond the sexual fantasy. You need to adjust your fantasy to incorporate things that benefit your partner and appeal to her. Her being sexually dominant to you is not a sustainable benefit for her. Being dominant can be fun but it is also work. Unlike submissive guys who crave to be dominated, most women can live with or without it. 

Taking on chores is one way for the submissive fantasy to transcend into reality and to make it appealing to your partner. I think it is safe to say that most, if not all, women do not enjoy doing chores. I absolutely love that I don't have to do them anymore. I don't ever want to go back to doing chores and so that is motivation for me to lead the WLM and keep it going strong by incorporating femdom to motivate my husband. My husband is motivated by sexual pleasure and his strong desire to be controlled and I am motivated by him working for me, pampering me, and treating me like a Queen. We’ve found the balance between those motivators that works well for us as a couple.

An environment can be created by the woman to add excitement to the chores for the guy. This is done by incorporating female domination and making the chores meaningful to the guy by holding him accountable for completing them. Some examples of how to do this are outlined below:

Training - Make it a big deal when you train him on new chores. Have him naked or in panties or a maid outfit, or some other outfit such as a collar and cuffs. Pulling him around on a leash while training him is also fun. Be firm and clear on your instructions and expectations for how he is to do the chore. A dominant and demanding tone is exciting for him. Carrying a riding crop or paddle with you while training is also fun. Give his butt a little slap to enforce certain points or to correct him if he is not doing something right. Make sure his cock is hard during the training. Give it a few strokes when he is doing good. Hold it firmly while you are giving him instructions. I like using it as a handle to pull him around the house :). Associating pleasure with chores, makes it exciting for him. Make him write down the chore expectations and keep a chore journal so that he does not forget. Do not hesitate to retrain him again if he starts slacking off on a chore. Your submissive husband will be very excited and eager to be trained  on chores if you incorporate some of the above techniques or add your own dominant spin to the training. 

Incorporate Reviews and Discipline  If you do not review his work regularly, he will begin to slack off on chores. If you are home while he is doing chores, take a look at his work and give him immediate feedback. If he is doing good, give his cock a little rub or give him a kiss and tell him how pleased your are with his work. If he forgot to do something or did not do a chore to your expectations, let him know and make him fix it. It's up to you if you want to add any discipline. Usually pointing out his mistake is enough because guys feel bad about not meeting your expectations. Sometimes I will say, I'll add that to the list for our review session, which usually results in added time for his weekly corner time. If there is a recurring problem then a punishment may be in order to help him stay focused. My husband has been sent to the corner a few times for not hanging my clothes properly and he's missed a guys night out because he's forgotten to mop the kitchen floor. 

It is very important that the wife/gf pay attention to the chores and provide feedback, both positive and negative, to the guy on his performance with chores. It is especially important to do this when he is being trained on a new chore. This is what makes it exciting for him and motivates him to do a good job. The wife should be strict in how she evaluates his performance and should not feel bad about disciplining or punishing him when needed. This is what submissive guys want. They need structure, high expectations, and to be held accountable. It is also important to provide positive motivators and reward him when he is meeting expectations. A cock rub is a good motivator and indulging in his fantasies and fetishes is a nice reward to. I love that one of my husband’s favorite rewards is when I order him to pleasure me with his tongue. 

I recommend that the wife use a combination of immediate feedback when possible, and a weekly review of his performance. I often make notes in my phone throughout the week of things I notice and then review them with him at our weekly review session. When he is being trained on a new chore, I pay close attention and give him more immediate feedback until I feel he is doing it perfect. It takes commitment from the wife to pay attention to the chores and  give feedback. I was not good with this in the beginning but over time I realized that when I did not pay attention, he slacked off on chores but when I paid close attention, not only was he motivated to do them but he was excited about it. Eventually I made the realization that the amount of time needed for oversight and feedback was a fraction of the time I was previously spending on doing the chores and that when I supervised, the house stayed much cleaner than it ever was before we changed to a WLM.  This made it easy for me to accept the responsibility.

Make him wear a chore outfit  A chore outfit helps put him in a submissive mode and adds a little excitement for him. Chore outfits have a strong psychological effect on submissive guys The outfit can be as simple as requiring him to wear a collar and/or cuffs or making him do chores naked. A butt plug most definitely brings out his submissive feelings. For many guys being feminized while doing chores is very exciting. The role reversal of him being the house wife is an exciting humiliation. This can range from requiring him to wear panties all the way up to being fully feminized with a bra, stockings, garters, and dress. A maid outfit is also fun. I require my my husband to wear "maid panties" that are black silk and trimmed with white lace. He does chores on a daily basis but Sundays are the day in which he does most of the house chores so that is the day he wears the maid panties. If the kids are around, he wears them under his clothes. If they are not home, then he does he chores in nothing but the panties. Sometimes I will make him iron my clothes naked.

Change his Perspective

Instead of making chores about doing work, change his thinking to be that he is doing chores to serve you and make your life better. He should feel privileged to be a servant or slave to a Goddess. It sounds simple, but it adds meaning to what he is doing. I often refer to him as slave or maid when he is doing chores. That always gets a rise out of him and adds pep to his step.  Guys - this is something you can do own your own without prompting from her. You just need to reframe your mental state to view chores differently. I was lucky that my husband always had this attitude about chores so he was an eager trainer.

Should he do all the chores?

If you read my previous two posts, then you know that my husband does just about every chore in our house. Do not shed any tears for him or have pity for him. He can handle it and he is living his fantasy. I would not expect the husband to do most of the chores in every WLM. The amount of chores assigned to him depends on your current lifestyle and his ability to take on the work. For example, if you have a very active social life or if his job is demanding and requires extra hours, then he may be limited in the amount of chores he can take on. I would also not advise that you assign him a lot of chores all at once. This is sure to burn him out or create a lot of stress for him. It took many years for me to assign most of the chores to my husband. Part of the reason for the long transition was tied to our lifestyle. As the kids got older and the craziness of coaching, and running them around to sporting events and activities subsided, he had more time on his hands. Also, he took on a new job that was less demanding than his previous one, which gave him more time. Before all these changes, he would have struggled to take on a lot of extra chores and so I shared in the chore responsibility. Part of the transition of chores was also tied to his ability to take on more chores. I would train him on one chore and then wait for him to get it down and get into a good routine before adding another. Overtime he became good and efficient at doing his new chores and so he was able to take on more.

So where does one start with the chores and figure out the right allocation? I would hope that in most traditional marriages the chores are split pretty evenly among husband and wife. Therefore, unless there is some unusual circumstances, in a WLM the guy should be doing more than 1/2 of the chores. For me it was a no-brainer to start with having him clean the bathrooms because I don't like doing it. Bathrooms also have the connotation of a "woman's" job so making him clean them is a great form of role reversal domination. Laundry was another big one that I was happy to transition to him. Establishing rules and high expectations for the chores he is already doing is another way to add to your control. For example, prior to our WLM, my husband was responsible for cleaning the dishes. There were times when dirty dishes would sit around for hours and even overnight. After WLM I established a rule that all dishes had to be cleaned by the end of the night and that he had to wipe down all counters and the table. Later I updated the rule that dishes had to be done immediately after dinner and any dishes from the evening had to be done before he went to bed. It is so much better now that dishes are not piled in the sink. When you have clear rules and expectations, it keeps him focused on getting things done. It also makes it easier for you to evaluate his performance because you have very specific standards that he has to meet.

While you don't want to overwhelm him, do not be afraid to push him hard. Guys can handle a lot and if he truly is serving you, then he should be working hard for you. If he is not working for you then he is probably spending time surfing for porn or fantasizing about how he wants to be dominated more, so it is in your best interest to keep him busy and doing things for you as much as possible.  When you incorporate the perspective of female domination into his chores, there is a certain excitement and pleasure that he gets from being forced to work hard for  you. My sense is that a lot of women are too easy or their husband/bf and that the guys want to be pushed harder. 

 After reading all of the above, you can see that doing chores in a WLM is much different than doing chores in a traditional marriage. The chores become a part of the domination dynamic and therefore become meaningful and at times exciting for the guy. Chores become integrated into the submissive fantasy and so it is not all work and no play. It is work mixed in with fantasy which makes chores more tolerable and sometimes fun.

-Mz Kaylee 

Tuesday, October 27, 2020

A Typical Weekend in My Wife Led Marriage

Weekends for us are less structured then week days but I still have lots of tasks and expectations for Thomas. He is required to do a full house cleaning, which includes the bathrooms, vacuuming, and changing the sheets on the bed. He also takes care of the yard and gardens as needed, does the weekly grocery shopping and puts gas in my car. When he is doing the house chores on the weekend he is required to wear sissy maid panties and a cock strap. If the kids are out of the house, then he does the indoor chores in nothing but the panties. I love seeing him scurry around in them. If the kids are home, then he wears them under his clothes.

On weekends, I make him drive me around for any errands that I want to do. I may also send him on his own (in his errand outfit) to do errands. Less structure is needed because we may have kids activities to go to, social events, family events, or I may have errands to do. In general, I expect him to get the chores done by the end of the weekend regardless of the events of the weekend. However, there are times where I need to make exceptions because we are tied up for most of the weekend with social or famiy events. When that happens, he needs to finish up on Monday and he is required to wear the maid parities all day Monday.

It is fantastic for me as I get to relax on the weekend and may hang out with a few girl friends while he is working. We're a days trip to the beach so in the summer I may head to the beach for the day or weekend while he works. He may, with my permission, hang out with "the guys" on the weekends but he still needs to get his chores done. However, most of the time we do social events together. Sundays are typically reserved for ourselves so he turns down requests from his friends to hang out on Sunday.   

Weekends are also when I do his weekly review, which incudes his maintenance corner time. His reviews are mostly positive, which is the way it should be. If your husband is not consistently doing well then that's a problem that needs to be solved. Weekends are also when I allow him to pleasure me. It's not to say that I never allow him to pleasure me during the week, but most of the time I am just too tired for it on a week night. When there is pleasure for me it usually includes teasing for him but sometimes I just want to be pleased! He gets such a thrill out of pleasuring me, that even if I don't touch him, he is fully aroused and loves it so do not have pity on him. It is a privilege for him to pleasure me.

I will indulge in kinky play every now and then on the weekends, but it is not too frequent. I just need to be in the right mood and often have to plan for it. Long weekends and vacations are always great for getting me in the kink mood. Although every once in awhile it just strikes me in the heat of the moment. Those are often the best times! Of course, kinky means different things for different people. A lot of what I do on a daily basis would be considered kinky to others but for us, it's not kink unless it's outside of the normal routine. There are many people who say kink is not needed in a WLM. The people who say that are usually the ones who are not getting it-lol! It's like saying you don't need an easy pass at the amusement park. Yeah- that's true, but when I do have easy pass, the experience is so much better!! So while it is true that you can have a good WLM without kink, I believe kink takes the WLM from good to awesome. It is fun and truly does motivate submissive guys and keep them happy!

Back to the topic of weekends.....My weekends are loosely structured but one thing I do my best to keep consistent is the weekly review and corner time. That's been a game changer in our relationship. It keeps us in tune with each other and helps recharge Thomas and keep him focused on me. I have learned that for the benefit of both him and I, it is better to do a short review than no review at all. If you miss one review, then it makes it easier to miss the next one, and next thing you no you are off track.

So there you have it - I've shared the typical week in my WLM. There certainly are many other rules and expectations that factor into it and there are always different activities and events that may require the structure to flex a bit, but hopefully you get the general idea of how it works. Some people run their WLMs in a more extreme way and others are less extreme. You have to do what works best for you!

What questions do you have?

-Mz Kaylee.

Thursday, October 22, 2020

A Typical Day in my Wife Led Marriage

During the week, every morning when I wake up, I have a hot cup of coffee, breakfast, and neatly pressed clothes waiting for me.  After breakfast, Thomas cleans up after me and then goes upstairs to make the bed, while I am on my way to work. Soon after, he is off to work, wearing panties under his clothes. He is required to dress in panties every day. During the work day we typically do not text or talk with each other unless there is a need. 

When I return home from work, I prepare dinner. I enjoy cooking so it is not a chore to me. Thomas  gets to enjoy the luxury of having dinner ready for him when he comes home from work. After dinner, I get up from the table, leaving all my dishes and trash for Thomas to clean up. He used to to do this at his leisure, but earlier this year I made it a rule that he needs to clean the dining room and kitchen and load the dishwasher immediately after we eat and not at his convenience. Once dinner is done I relax and watch TV or read. I sit in "my chair" which Thomas is not permitted to sit in. In the past I would often do errands at night but now I assign most of those to Thomas. I tell him what errands he needs to do and he obeys without complaint. He has a special errand outfit that he must wear anytime he does errands for me. It consists of a pair of pink silky panties accented with black and pink lace ribbons, a studded strap that goes around the base of his cock, and a butt plug. Anytime I give him an errand to do, he changes into this outfit and then when he returns home, he removes the items and changes back to his normal panties. Errands for him are not an every day thing. Usually just once or twice a week but sometimes for fun, I will give him two separate errands in the same day so that he has to change in and out of the outfit more than once. I just love that he is walking around in public with a plug up his ass. It keeps him in a very submissive mind while he is away from me and certainly keeps him out of trouble. I've noticed that he usually horny after errands.

In the evenings, if time allows, Thomas may watch TV with me. We have a few Netflix and DVR shows that we like to watch together. While watching the shows Thomas will often be folding laundry or starting a new load of laundry. He is 100% responsible for keeping up with all the laundry in the house. Around 9pm I head upstairs to get ready for bed. I lay out my work clothes for the day and take a shower or bath. While I am in the bathroom, Thomas will iron my clothes. Then I am off to bed and Thomas goes downstairs to finish up his nightly duties, which include emptying the dishwasher, letting the dog out, tidying up the house so it looks nice for me in the morning, hand washing his panties, and locking up for the night. Then he quietly slips into bed naked. He is not permitted to wear anything while sleeping.

That is a typical day in my house. As you can see Thomas wakes up before me and goes to sleep after me every day. Most of his day is focused on serving me and it is wonderful. I also enjoy having a clean house every day and not having  to lift a finger to do it. Take note that with the exception of errands, he does all these things without being told. On a typical day, I am not standing over him barking orders and criticizing his every move, as many guys fantasize about. That is not a practical or sustainable way of running a WLM. I don't want to spend my day being a bitch. No, I'd rather have him do everything for me without being told and have him pamper and obey me without question and without drama. Guys, that is what women want. That is the life of a Goddess! Also, notice that my typical day does not involve sex. Sorry to bust the fantasy but WLM does not mean you are having lots of sex or that every night I am donning leather and whips and ordering him to worship me. If Thomas is lucky I will give him a "rub" or two during the day just enough to get his arousal going. These rubs are good motivators for him. It's like petting the dog.

Having said all that, there is a definite dominate and submissive dynamic present every day. I tell him things more than ask. He knows what is expected of him and knows that he will be punished or disciplined if he disobeys or does not meet my expectations. Punishments are rare. If I am having to punish him frequently, then there are issues in the relationship. A good obedient slave rarely needs to be punished. I am also very forthcoming with him when I feel he is not meeting expectations, making mistakes or is showing a bad attitude. I keep a very high standard for him. He is open to my criticism and obeys without complaint and accepts punishment or discipline when it is given. On occasion he may get defensive and I immediately point out his defensiveness and he quiets down.

It all sounds so simple, but it took many years for us to get to this place. It was a bit of a roller coaster ride, with lots of ups and downs, but well worth the ride. Nowadays there are lots of ups with very few downs.

Weekends are a different story and there are things that I do to keep the WLM running like a well oiled machine. It does not just happen on its own. I incorporate kink and sexual fun, as you can tell by my posts. It's just not an every day thing. I will write more in my next post.

-Mz Kaylee