Fun With Orgasm Control-The Negotiation

 When the mood strikes me and I feel like toying with Thomas, I will negotiate his his orgasm or add conditions to earning his orgasm. Well....it is not much of a negotiation because he has absolutely no leverage, but I like to make him think that he has some ability to negotiate. This always turns into a fun erotic mind game for him. I'll push his limits to see how desperate and weak he becomes.

The negotiation and conditions can start before the teasing begins. For couples who have established days or dates for orgasm, it can be fun for the wife to start a few days in advance and demand tasks be done prior to his orgasm day. Not completing the tasks in time and to expectations could result in pushing back the orgasm date, the orgasm date being skipped, or a ruined orgasm. The tasks could be extra chores or errands above and beyond his normal chores such as scrubbing the refrigerator clean, cleaning and organizing your shoes, and polishing the door knobs. For added enjoyment, make him do them naked or while wearing a special outfit. The tasks could also be intended to humiliate him or reinforce his submission to you. For example, you could require him to buy himself panties and lingerie for himself and wear them every day until his orgasm day. The point here is that he is working extra hard to earn his orgasm or he is humiliating himself or doing something very submissive in order to earn his orgasm. 

It gets even more exciting when you negotiate these things when he has been edged over and over again and is desperate for orgasm. Perhaps you hold out pretty panties and demand he put them on or lose the opportunity for orgasm. Even better, make him beg you to put them on and make him tell you he wants to wear them for you. If he hesitates or resists, well then I guess he does not want to really orgasm. There are so many things you can negotiate: lick your ass, bark like a dog, hump your leg, beg to be pegged by your strap-on, drink your pee....the list is endless! When his mind is mush and he is teetering on the edge, he will turn into a slut and do just about anything. Remember that this is all being done in good fun. Having my husband under my complete control and willing to do anything is thrilling. One of the most exciting things for me is when he has that look of 'I can't believe I'm doing this,' while at the same time his cock his swollen harder than ever. His hard cock is proof that he is  loving it! Trust me, it is a thrilling mind fuck for the guy when he is manipulated like this. When he has been teased over and over again and is consumed in arousal, the more humiliating and crazy things you make him do, the more mind blowing and exciting it is for him. He may even feel ashamed afterward, but that is exactly the mind fuck that he craves and that is the mind fuck that he will remember for years to come. I once made my husband retrieve a tampon and stick it up his ass and then stroke himself to orgasm in front of me. He did it and was completely aroused by it. He later confessed to me that it was one of the most embarrassing and thrilling experiences. I still sometimes tease that if he is not good that I will make him buy his own tampons and wear them to work. He gets all quiet at the mention of it and I know he also gets aroused thinking about it.

All the things I mentioned so far, can be put into action before he has an orgasm or while he orgasms. For example, you can make him hump your leg to an orgasm or make him lick your ass before you decide to let him orgasm. How many things can you get him to do for just one orgasm? He is sure to go deep into subspace, when he is seduced into doing more and more things for you. It is also fun to make him confess or promise things, even if they are not true. Make him confess that he will do anything for you or that he is weak. Make him confess that he likes to dress like a pretty girl for you or that he is a sissy for you. If he resists, tell him that is just fantasy and that you want him to do it for your amusement (you can later tease him that he confessed this to you). Do not let him orgasm until he gives in to your demands! Fantasy confessions have quite a psychological impact because once he confesses it, the thought will resurface in his mind again at another time and he may even get aroused by it. Make him confess something enough times and he may begin to believe it or like it. 

You can also negotiate for things to be done after the orgasm. He must promise to lick up his mess afterward. If he does not agree, then no orgasm for him. Make him promise that if you allow an orgasm he has to buy you something, take you on a trip, or do extra chores. I have a standing rule that my husband has to buy me a gift after every orgasm that I allow for him. Orgasms are never free for him! There are many women who require that their man always lick up his cum after an orgasm (and there are many creative ways to make him do it).

If you really want to get into the mind games, you can give him choices that affect the timing of his orgasm.  For example: 'I will let you orgasm two days before your orgasm date, if you wear a bra to the grocery store' or 'I will let you out of your chastity device for 1-day but then your orgasm date gets pushed back two weeks.'  A few days later, offer to tease him out of the cage for 10 minutes for the price of pushing his orgasm back another 2 weeks. I think it's fun to sometimes give him options where you know he is going to say no to the option and stick with the the denial. For example, I doubt my husband would agree to wear a bra in public. Of course, you may be surprised at what he agrees to when he is all horned up. Even when he does not choose the option, it is still a thrill for him because he knows that he gave up the option for an orgasm and for just a second or two, the thought of doing the option (i.e. wearing a bra in public) ran through his mind. 

You can have a lot of fun throwing different scenarios out him to choose from:

• When he is desperate to cum and knows that after he orgasms, the next orgasm will not come for 2 months, would he choose a ruined orgasm now or a full orgasm a week from now? 
• Would he choose to have PIV sex now if it meant that his orgasm would be pushed back a month? 
• Would he give up a night out with his friends if you were offering to give him an orgasm that night (and he is foolish enough to choose his friends over time with you then he should be punished swiftly). 

My husband loves when I queen him so I once had him teetering on the edge of orgasm and whispered while I stroked him, "I can give an orgasm right now or I can allow you to worship my pussy while I Queen you.  You have 10 strokes to decide."

There are endless scenarios and games you can play and guys absolutely love the mind fuck. What better way to create a loyal and dedicated slave than to be the woman who knows how to fuck his mind so bad that he can not think straight. It is really bizarre but these crazy moments often turn into deep intimate moments that bring you closer together as couple. I've experienced it myself and I have had many people write or comment to me that they have experienced it. It is truly an incredible experience when this happens.

Every now and then when my husbands wants an orgasm he will try to start the negotiation with me, telling me that he will do whatever I want for an orgasm. Silly boy! First of all, I know that he really is looking for a tease and not an orgasm. Second, he does not get to initiate the negotiation. I don't know why he tries because my response is always, "I don't need to negotiate. You'll do whatever I want anyway slave."  He knows not to push further or I may just start assigning him tasks. Isn't it ironic that he has no leverage whatsoever, but when he is aroused or desperate for orgasm, he will still fall right into the negotiation trap?

Have fun Goddesses. Start negotiating your husband into erotic oblivion!

-Mz Kaylee 

Fun With Orgasm Control-Giving Permission to Orgasm

When it comes to orgasm control, most people focus on orgasm denial. However, giving permission to orgasm is a very important aspect of orgasm control. It is exciting for the both the guy and the woman when he asks for permission to orgasm and she says 'yes,' and he immediately explodes into orgasm. Her "Yes," gives him instant pleasure and fills him with gratitude toward her for allowing the pleasure. That is powerful. It is even more powerful when she commands him to cum and he releases immediately. There are many fun ways to send him into the bliss of orgasm.

Just say Yes! The approach that I use most often, which is not very often since my husband does not get many orgasms :), is to simply say ‘Yes’ when he is on edge and begging. Then the flood gates open and it's instant orgasm! Sometimes before he starts to beg I will tell him he can orgasm. This usually surprises him. One time he even asked “really?” I guess he wanted to make sure he heard me right. Once given permission, it only took a few seconds for him to erupt.

Command him to cum! If I want to revel in my power over him, then I will command him to cum. It is fun to tease him and then suddenly order “cum for me now slave!” He never disappoints and obeys immediately. I add a “good boy,” as I pump him dry. Notice I add the words “for me.” The two words are impactful and make it clear that he is having an orgasm because I want him to. The “good boy” emphasizes my approval of his obedience. Those words add to his overall submissive experience.

5-4-3-2-1! A count down is another fun way to get him to orgasm. 10 is a good number to start at but you can make the count down as long or as short as you want. It is fascinating at how much a count down affects a person’s emotions. As the count down gets closer to 0, the excitement builds and builds knowing that an exciting event is going to occur. Think about how you feel when watching a New Year’s count down. At 3, your body tenses, ready to explode with cheers, at 2 the cheers are starting to formulate in your mind at at 1 there’s no stopping the cheer from bursting out. Translate that to an orgasm count down and you get a guy whose arousal grows exponentially during the count down. By the time you reach 1, he is sure to cum exactly when you command. 

A steady count down is fun in itself, as you can watch the excitement grow during the countdown. There are many variations you can experiment with to add more fun. Varying the pace of the countdown is a great mind game for him. Starting off with a steady countdown and then switching  to a much slower pace will make him struggle to hold back his orgasm. Be forewarned that if you suddenly slow the pace in the last few numbers, you have a high risk of a premature orgasm as his mind and body may already be in release mode. On the other hand it is a good test of his will power and can be thrilling to watch him tense his body and try to hold back with all his might until you finally reach 1 and give the command. You could also do the opposite and speed up the pace at the end. I don't think any guy will have trouble adjusting to the faster pace and exploding on command. Restarting the count down before you get to 1 is another fun option.

When I've done the count down approach, I've stroked his cock while counting. I tend to just naturally stroke in rhythm with the count down, speeding up and slowing down my strokes accordingly. Sometime I will even verbally tease him in between numbers, either telling him how weak he is or building up his anticipation by telling he is getting closer to his orgasm..."only a few more numbers....get ready to cum...."

You could also make him stroke himself while you do the count down or you could do the count down during intercourse and time it so that you orgasm together. It would be interesting to try to bring him to orgasm by first taking him right to the edge and then starting the count down and not stroking his cock at all. What do you think, will he still cum at 0? Finally, if you are feeling a little cruel, then you can stop stroking when you command him to cum and just watch as he experiences a ruined orgasm

Orgasm on cue! Setting a cue that initiates his orgasm can be fun. Let him know what the cue is in advance and then let the teasing begin! He will desperately be waiting for the cue, ready to explode the instant it happens. Try these ideas:

• When you orgasm starts (or ends) his can start
• Stroke his cock and when you squeeze his balls he can orgasm
• A kiss from you initiates his orgasm
• Listen to music or watch a movie while you tease him and when a certain word is said or a specific action occurs, such as an explosion or gun shot, he can cum. You can have fun with this if you plan in advance and know when the cue is going to occur. You can really build up his pleasure right up to the cue moment and even command him to cum when the cue occurs.
• Order him to drink your golden juices while he strokes himself and he can cum after he consumes the very last drop.

Final Thoughts

Remember, that orgasm control is about both denial and giving permission to cum. Both are powerful signals to him that you are in control of him and both deepen his submission and obedience to you. Most people who incorporate orgasm control into their daily life, fall into a regular routine of denial and control and that is a good thing as it is a extremely effective tool for managing the guy. However, WLM/FLR is also about having fun and adding spice to the relationship. A great way to do that is to change the orgasm control routine every now. I encourage you to give the ideas above a try. You can even use a few of the ideas together. For example, a count down and a command to cum go great together!  Enjoy and be sure to comment and let me know how it goes or if you have other ideas.

-Mz Kaylee

Fun With Orgasm Control-Intense Teasing and Denial

In my last post I discussed common strategies for orgasm control and how orgasm control is a powerful tool in a WLM/FLR. Orgasm control was the very first thing I did with my husband. It was my introduction into WLM and Female Control. It was all at his request, so everything was brand new to me at the time. When he first explained to me that I could decide when he could orgasm and that I could make him pleasure me without him having an orgasm, I thought it was strange but it sounded like fun so I decided to give it a try. Those first few weeks were the most sex filled weeks that I ever experienced. There were lots of orgasms for me and very few for him. I was having a blast teasing and denying him and he was loving it to. I actually had to put the brakes on the fun because I could not continue at that pace. It was physically exhausting for me and if that's all we did, we would never get anything done! 

In the beginning, it was all fun and fantasy for me. Thomas had told me that I could use orgasm control as a method to get him to do things for me but I really had no clue of the power that I held by controlling his orgasms. We were married at the time but not in a WLM. There was no control or authority exerted by me outside of the bedroom. However, in the bedroom he always had to ask for permission to orgasm. Over time I discovered the power of orgasm control and how to use it as a tool for control. My actions with orgasm control became more purposeful and less about the fantasy. It was still enjoyable but there was less emphasis on the fun part as it became a normal part of day-to-day life. That is a logical progression for couples who stick with orgasm control. However, I do still like to have a little fun with orgasm control on a frequent basis. In fact, it is a lot of fun for both of us when I take advantage of my power to control his orgasm and exert a little extra teasing, denial, and control. In this post I will share thoughts on the fun of intense teasing and denial.

I have to say that the better I got at teasing my husband and keeping him on the edge of orgasm, the more fun it became for me. It is exciting for me to see him in a highly aroused state and desperate for an orgasm. Seeing him struggling to hold back and knowing that I can easily push him over the edge is thrilling. One of my favorite things to do is bring him to the edge over and over again. Sometimes I will just let him rest for a minute before I start teasing again and sometimes I will make him pleasure me in between teasing. I've become skilled with knowing how different strokes and different pressure affects his arousal. Long firm strokes will bring him to an orgasm quickly. Soft light strokes will drive him crazy without bringing him to orgasm. I can keep him riding the edge of orgasm with just one finger. If he is close to orgasm, lightly playing with his balls allows me to continue teasing him while also allowing him to calm down just enough to get off the edge. Then I go back to stroking his cock without missing a beat. There are many other in-between strokes that I have fun with. 

It's fun to tell him 'no' when he begs for orgasm and there are so many ways to do it. My tone of voice may be authoritative, playful, or dismissive- as if the idea of him asking for an orgasm was silly. I may say 'no slave' and then give him one or two more strokes and watch him fight to hold back the orgasm. I might tell him 'no' and that there will ne no orgasm for him today. Will he still beg for an orgasm when I bring him to the edge again, even though I've told there will be none or will he beg me to stop stroking him so that he does not have an orgasm without my permission? When he is in his mindless state I like to tell him how weak he is, how he is helpless under my control and will do anything for me.  Do you think that I am brainwashing him by planting those thoughts into his scattered mind?

When I am focused on teasing him, I enjoy mixing it up by sometimes bringing him to the edge quickly and stopping at the point he begs for orgasm and sometimes bringing him there slowly and keeping him at the point where he is riding the edge of orgasm for several minutes. I have discovered that when he is close to orgasm, just holding my hand around his cock and lightly squeezing every 10 or 20 seconds will keep him on the edge, struggling not to cum. This blows his mind as every second he is processing whether or not the next stroke or squeeze will take him over the edge. Thomas has told me that when he is on edge, even just the feel of my hand firmly wrapped around his cock and not moving is an intense tease for him. Just the slightest thrust of his cock will send him over the edge. He has to fight his body's natural instinct to thrust into the warm tightness around his cock. It takes a tremendous amount of will power for him to hold back. It is exciting for me to watch him struggle not to move and not to cum. 

When he has been teased to the edge, in his weakened state he must decide whether to ride the pleasure for one more stroke or beg for permission to cum or beg me to stop so that he does not cum. After just a few minutes of teasing like this, he is mindless. All the worries of the world have melted away and he is intensely focused on me and the pleasure running though him. His only thought is 'can I last another second longer?' After about 10 minutes of this, he is in subspace, drowning in his own pleasure, unable to think on his own and completely at my mercy. That ladies, is why men who discover teasing and denial, love it and become addicted to it!  The tease becomes more exciting than the orgasm.

There are several options for me when he has reached that subspace state of mind. Most times, the teasing gets me all worked up to so I order him to pleasure me. When he is in this highly aroused state he is always full of energy and eager to pleasure me so it's a fantastic experience for me. He never calms down either, so after my orgasm he is desperate for an orgasm and does not want the fun to stop.  I may tease him a bit more and not give in to his pleas for an orgasm.

Another option I choose after an intense teasing session is to end the session and tell him to pull himself together. It of course will take him a long time to calm down and his mind will be mush the rest of the night. Usually after an intense teasing sessions, he will wake up a few times during the night, aroused and fully erect. The effect of the teasing carries into the next day or two. He is like a good little puppy for me and very thankful for the teasing. It's also fun because in those next few days, he is easily aroused. A slight touch from me, simple command, or even taking an authoritative tone will make his cock hard. I enjoy toying with him by making him hard (sometimes without even touching him) and then walking away. Sometimes I will do a 10- 15 minute tease session several days in a row just for fun. I will often do this prior to a "training day" in order to get him in the right frame of mind for training.

Then there is the option of having more fun with him through domination. When your guy's mind is all mush from intense teasing, it is so much fun to order him around or even try some kinky things with him. It's quite amusing how guys can not think straight when their mind is fried from arousal. I can just spout off orders and he obeys without thought. I may make him kneel and kiss my feet, lick my shoes, or lick my ass. He obeys without question and without thought. I may put him in a collar and leash and walk him around the house.  It's also fun to make him promise things to you when he is in this state, because he will agree to just about anything.  "I promise to always treat you like a Goddess," "I promise to start doing the laundry for you," "I promise to buy you jewelry,"  ahh...so much fun! When he is in subspace, suddenly the idea of him slipping on a teddy or eating his own cum is arousing to him. I can get him to do just about anything. The truth is that I can get him to do these things anyway because I am the boss and he is a submissive slut, but it's fun to get him to agree to these things when he is in a weakened state. It's also a thrill for him to know that he is being manipulated by me but yet he can not resist my feminine power over him. Many submissive guys crave to be manipulated like that.

There is always the option of letting him cum during an intense teasing session. Not! Just kidding. On a rare occasion I may give him permission to cum. The surprised look on his face immediately followed by an intense orgasm explosion is an enjoyable sight for me. There is still no thought from him; just an immediate reaction by his body to orgasm upon permission. I love that control!

I will share more fun ideas in the next post....

-Mz Kaylee