Thank you all who commented on my last blog. I am happy to see people sharing their thoughts and experiences. This post is in response to the comments. Many of you commented on how you have daily rituals. Rituals are a wonderful part of a FLR and rituals help keep the sub in a submissive and obedient state of mind. I particularly like the following statement from an anonymous commenter in regards to a ritual of kissing her feet:
"she told me that at first this made her uncomfortable, then she thought it was "sweet," then she came to expect it!"
A very insightful statement and it probably rings true for many people who are just starting with FLR. Rituals and other actions related to a FLR will probably feel uncomfortable or even silly when you try them for the first time. Sometimes just the idea seems silly. However, this should not stop you from trying them. In the heat of the moment, silly things can become very hot! Rituals may seem uncomfortable or silly to both the Female and male at first. But each time the ritual is performed, it becomes less silly and more meaningful. As the comment above implies, eventually it becomes a meaningful part of what you do. Through repetition the ritual can have a long term effect the submissive's mind, attitude, and behavior. The fact that several of you commented on rituals on my post about 'Psycological aspects of FLR' further support this statement.
I find that rituals are even more impactful when you connect specific thoughts or symbolism to the ritual. For example, when Thomas kisses any part of my body, he knows it is a form of worship and obedience. He knows this because I trained him over and over again that he is worshipping me when he kisses my feet, my legs, etc. Early in his training, I had him say I worship and obey you every time he kissed my body. Now it is ingrained in his head that he is worshipping and obeying whenever he kisses my body. If I command him to worship my feet, he will instantly kiss them.
For any couple starting out in FLR, I highly recommend some type of daily or regular worship ritual where the sub kneels before his dominant partner, kisses her feet, and recites a mantra such as "I worship and obey you. Thank your for being a wonderful Goddess to me. Please teach and mold me to be your perfect servant." This ritual will help the submissive mentally transition into a true submissive role in the relationship. When starting out in a FLR, it often feels more like fantasy than reality. Both the submissive and the dominant may just be going through the motions to satisfy each other or a desire within. On the surface the FLR is in place, but when you dig deeper the submissive still has some sense of control. The worship ritual will mentally change his thinking and add reality to his submissiveness towards you.
As discussed above, the first time the ritual is performed it might be uncomfortable for both of you. You may even laugh and that is fine. FLR is not all serous. Laughter is good. However, as the ritual is performed over and over again, the words sink in and take a deeper meaning for the submissive. Through repetition he begins to truly worship you and want to obey you. You become a Goddess to him and he is open to be trained by you. The ritual brings reality to his submission and increases the dominants control over him.
Rituals have other purposes as well. A nice benefit of rituals is once a ritual is established, the submissive knows exactly what to do. The Dominant partner does not have to worry about giving commands (unless they are part of the ritual) or telling the submissive what to do. We have a bath ritual that I just love. With the kids being older it does not happen often, but when it does, Thomas knows exactly what to do and I can just relax and be pampered. I just have to whisper to him, "get my bath ready." He immediately goes into action, lighting candles, running my bath water and adding bubble bath. He brings an extra fluffy towel and my robe into the bathroom. He knows I like my bath water on the hot side. He knows to shut the bathroom door so the room is warm and smells of the bubble bath scent when I walk in. When I enter, he is always naked and kneeling by the tub. I enter the bath and lay back and relax. He is to remain quiet and worship my body with his eyes while I relax. He knows that but sometimes I command him to worship my body just for the purpose of reinforcing my dominance over him. When I am ready, I order him to wash me. Sometimes he will also shave my legs. When the bath is over, I will stand outside the tub and he will dry me off. I do not move. I enjoy seeing him move all around me and bending down to dry me off. He knows he has to do a great job at drying me before putting on my robe. It is a great ritual that makes me feel like a true Goddess and also makes Thomas feel like a true servant to me. We both enjoy this ritual and every time we do the bath ritual it reinforces my dominance over him and his submission to me.
I encourage you to incorporate rituals into your lifestyle. They can be daily, weekly, monthly or just done on command. Connecting purposeful thoughts and symbolism to the ritual makes it more impactful and can mentally mold the submissive's long-term thoughts and perceptions in a positive way. Please feel free to comment on rituals that you do and whether or not they have affected your thinking or brought more meaning to your FLR.
Mz Kaylee.
