After
writing the last series of posts on the submissive craving, I feel the need to
do a reality check. I don’t want people to think those posts represent the
day-to-day life in a wife-led-marriage (WLM). There is a lot of fantasy,
exaggerated dominance, and role play integrated into the concepts I wrote
about. Fantasy days, power trips, and
boot camp are different tools that can be used to spice things in the marriage
while also helping solidify the WFM.
They are fun ways to make it happen and are not activities that happen
on a regular basis.
These
activities quench the craving for dominance and control that submissive men
desire. I recommend the wife to engage in these fantasy activities on occasion
to help satisfy that desire and because of the many other benefits, which I
outlined in my last post. The key words in the last sentence are “on occasion.”
It is not practical or realistic for most people to live their life in an
extreme dominant lifestyle. I also don’t think it’s healthy, nor is it how I
would want to live. I don’t want my husband to be a mindless slave. I don’t
want to make all the decisions in the house. I want a husband who is my friend
and that I can have an intelligent conversation with, and that we can do things
together and have fun.
A WLM is
not about constant training, punishment, and discipline, and extreme strictness.
These things are incorporated into the WLM but are not every-day activities.
The WLM is a mindset that the wife is head
of household and has the right to final say in all decisions. The
husband yields to the wife’s authority and works to please and satisfy her. The
wife’s needs and desires have top priority but she leads the marriage with love
and consideration for the husband’s needs and desires and the husband willingly
serves his wife out of love and the desire to please her.
That is the
core of WLM. All the other details add the fun and spice to the marriage. Each
couple is different and can define those details based on what they want. I
hope that series of posts provided ideas that you can apply into your own marriage.
Have some fun and give them a try. If you do, please comment and let us know how
things went. Also, feel free to share your own ideas and experience.
-Mz Kaylee
Mz Kaylee-it is clear from your many posts that you deeply love your husband, so for those of us regular readers this disclaimer is not needed. He is undoubtedly one of the luckiest and happiest husbands anywhere thanks to your deep understanding of him and your marriage. You have helped many marriages including mine by your sharing. My wife and I both read your posts. Thank you.
ReplyDeleteVery well put Mz Kaylee. She is the head of household in our marriage but i do have input in decision making. Its not whips and chains or leather outfits, she likes being in control and i like her in control and love serving her. i make a list everyday and post it. It has dinner suggestions(she got tired of coming up with dinner everyday) and a list of things i need to get done along with things that would be nice for her to do if she has the time while im at work.its more of a cute thing rather than anything kinky.
ReplyDeletejerry
Thank you Mistress Kaylee. You are terrific
ReplyDeletejj
Hi Mz. Kaylee, speaking of a reality check i was wondering if you could post about how you dealt with allowing your husband to interact with his family and friends upon the start of your WLM journey? For example how did you decide who's family you would visit for holidays? What about letting your husband interact with his friends? How much leeway if any was he allowed to have without it being a disservice your WLM? How has this evolved with time?
ReplyDeleteThank you,
Roxsub
Nothing really changed with family Both our families are local so it's never been an issue for the holidays. With friends, we do most things as a couple so most of our friends are mutual. If we get invited out i am the one who decides if we go. Many of our friends have figured that out and so they ofen text me and not him when they want to make plans with us. If he wants to go out with just guys he must ask me for permission. Most times I approve his request but not if he has been bad or lazy with his chores
DeleteIn this respect my Wife uses the same approach as Mz Kaylee. She introduced this dimension of domination about two years ago, completely on Her own, I never asked for it. At first I thought She was just kidding and teasing me. I learned that it was for real the hard way. I have to ask for permission well in advance if I plan to go out with my friends (outings and everything else related to my work is an exception). Usually I get the permission with no limits, but sometimes I have to be back by certain hour. Sometimes She allows me to call Her later to ask for an extension (which is not always given). If I ask for permission too late I may very well end up grounded. Talking back always buys me a grounding or a suspension of some privillige. I certainly don't enjoy this kind of disciplining and do my best to avoid it. Not always successfully. My Wife may easily cancel a permission already granted if I misbehave in between (yes, I was even humiliated into canceling a couple of times). And once She put me in position where I had to ask for permission in presence of one of Her girlfriends (it was my fault because I hadn't asked earler). I was scalded for forgetting about it and She gave me a humiliatingly tight curfew and warned me against getting back late. This was probably my most embarassing (and incredibly arousing at the same time) experience do far, and the other woman was very much amused by the show and by my humble "Yes, dear, thank you dear, I am sorry I forgot". Clearly She must have already known a thing or two about it, but my Wife refuses to tell me how much this lady (or two other girlfriends) knows about my submissiveness or our FLR power dynamics.
DeleteTom, that's kind of how it's going here in my FLR. I've had to adjust to having to ask for permission, and to limiting how much I get to see friends and family. That's probably been the toughest part for me because I'm a very social person and my Wife is not. She gave me a spanking about Thanksgiving because I talked back about wanting to get there a bit earlier since we have to leave early because She works a night shift. I'll definitely never forget it, She had me kneel and kiss Her feet later as I apologized for talking back and thanked Her for punishing me. I've never been more in awe of Her.
ReplyDeleteRoxssub