We all know that males overflow with sexual energy. It's like the moment they first discovered sexual pleasure in their adolescence, it ignited an endless volcano of sexual desire. It seems virtually impossible for men to contain it. Erections are rampant, porn addictions are common, crude sexual jokes and comments never get old with men, and men are always looking to get laid or dreaming about it. Their sexual energy is constant and radiates from every inch of their bodies. I usually don't like to generalize about people but in this case I think it's appropriate. Sure, some guys are better at managing it on the surface, but I'm pretty sure what I described above fits 99% of guys to some degree. Guys, if you disagree feel free to voice your opinion but first make sure you read this entire post so you understand my complete thinking on this topic.
I am convinced that men are hard wired with constant sexual energy. It is in their nature. The challenge is that not all women are prepared to meet this level of sexual energy and most men do not have women at their beck and call to quench their energy. At a young age, a female partner is not even an option for boys. It almost seems cruel that puberty starts at such a young age for boys. The result is that boys and teenagers resort to chronic masturbation and porn. Sexual jokes and inappropriate public behavior also come into play and are signs of their sexual energy spilling over; symbolic of their desperate pleas for sex. When they finally do reach a point where they have a meaningful relationship with a woman, they've already formed these bad habits. These bad habits continue into the relationship unless something (or someone) forces things to change.
The Married Masturbating Man
Let's fast forward to marriage. Ladies, whether you know it or not, you husband is masturbating and looking at porn and probably doing some of the other items mentioned above. Unless you have already grabbed the bull by the horns and put a stop to it, it's happening. Masturbating is not necessarily a bad thing. For single guys it's a normal part of life. A guy needs to release his sexual energy on a regular basis, especially younger guys. For married guys, it's also a release when they are not getting enough sexual attention from their wife. I'm going to go out on a limb here and guess that that majority of married men and men in committed relationships have a much higher sex drive and need for sex than their partner. I know it's not true for every couple, but it is a common problem. Therefore masturbation is a way for them to release that sexual energy while still staying faithful to their partner.
While I see masturbation as acceptable in a traditional marriage, it can become destructive and I see it as wasted energy. Masturbation becomes destructive when it consumes the husband's sex life. If he is spending more time fantasizing about other women and masturbating, compared to the intimate and quality time he is spending with his wife, then it is a problem. There are many reasons why this could happen, some of which could be the fault of the husband and some could be the fault of the wife. I don't not intend to get into the 'why' discussion in this post. Instead I'd like to discuss how to prevent it or change it. You see, un-monitored masturbation is wasted energy that has little benefit to the wife. In a WLM, the wife should put a stop to her husband's self-masturbation and redirect his sexual energy to her.
The first step is to call him out on it and lay down the law that he is not allowed to masturbate without permission. The second step is to take control of his orgasms. No orgasms without your permission. He must always ask for permission to orgasm. You (the wife) decide when and how he orgasms - no exceptions. By implementing these two steps, you are redirecting all his sexual energy toward you and away from random masturbation and fantasizing about other women. This gives you an exciting power over him. Since you are the one that holds the key to his orgasms, he will start to bend over backwards to please you in order to get an orgasm.
Orgasm control also forces a mental shift in the male mind and puts you at the center of his attention. What I have heard from my husband and other guys is that, when under orgasm control, fantasies still run wild in their head. In fact, when you incorporate orgasm denial, the fantasies becomes even more frequent and more wild. However, the fantasies start to evolve around you and not other women. Take a moment to pause and think about the effect of that on your husband. Suddenly you are the center of his fantasy and he is fantasizing about you frequently - probably daily. It's no doubt that his fantasies involve you dominating him in some extreme way. Put all this together with orgasm control and no masturbation without permission, and the result is that his arousal is constant and his mind is sinking deeper into submission to you. Not just submission but submission to you. It's very powerful and it is real.
Managing His Sexual Energy
Once you put orgasm and masturbation control into effect, your work is not done. You can't just implement these rules and then do nothing and expect him to always be a perfect little subbie for you (that would be nice, wouldn't it!). His mind will be going wild by not being allowed to orgasm or masturbate. You need to monitor and manage him on an ongoing basis in order to keep him obedient and focused on you. This is especially important when your first start out.
The monitoring is about being in tune with his emotions and mind set. Pay attention to his mood, attitude, and horniness. If you are seeing large mood swings or he starts to become very needy or annoying, then it's probably a sign that he needs an orgasm to release all that built up tension and emotion caused by orgasm denial. Too much denial and restriction can back fire on you and de-motivate him.
If he is super horny...perfect! He is in a weakened state of mind and ripe for having your way with him. This is when you have the most power and influence over him so have fun Goddesses! When orgasm control is done right, he is in a constant state of arousal and always at your mercy. That is the result of you harnessing all that wasted energy from masturbation and using it to create value for you!
In addition to monitoring his state of mind, you need to manage his sexual energy on an ongoing basis with the objective of keeping him in a steady horny state. Keeping him in this state of mind keeps him focused on you and keeps him productive and obedient for you. The work it takes to manage his sexual energy pays off in dividends for you.
Think of it as keeping a warm campfire burning. A nice steady fire on a cool night feels great. If you stand a few feet away you feel a comforting and pleasant warmth. That is his steady state arousal. However, the fire is not going maintain its warmth on its own. You need to add some fuel to the fire to keep it going. Every now and then you have to throw some wood on the fire to keep it burning. The great thing about submissive men is that there are lots of sources of fuel for their sexual energy. A few minutes of cock teasing stokes the fire. Ordering him to orally pleasures you causes an inferno. When a guy is in his steady aroused state, simply taking a strict tone or ordering him to do something can fuel his sexual energy. With my husband, all I need to do speak to him or question him in a commanding tone and *boom!* his arousal spikes. Something as easy as ordering him to clean the bedroom or kneeling before me starts an erection growing in his pants.
There are so many ways to stoke the fire. The bigger the log, the more combustible the fuel, the more sexual energy and arousal you get. Intense teasing sessions, sex, domination and fantasy play are all highly combustible fuels. If I do any of these with Thomas, his arousal is a raging fire and the effect lasts for days. Not only does his arousal intensify; his submission, obedience, and loyalty to me intensifies. The smart wife, recognizes this and leverages it to benefit her.
With your husband, if you set a goal to throw at least one log in the fire each day to fuel his sexual energy, then you'll always have a nice warm fire to enjoy. Just a few minutes a day will keep his arousal flowing. Sometimes, I will just tease his cock long enough to get him hard and then stop. That's all he gets for the day! If you can drop more then one log on the fire in a day or do one of the more intense activities to get his energy raging, that is even better. A good goal is to incorporate the more intense item at least once a week.
Keeping the Fire Burning
These are just guidelines. Everyone is different and requires different levels of attention to get results. Some of you may already be doing these types of things more frequently and other women may struggle to keep up with the guidelines I provided. You may have days or weeks where you don't do anything because other things in life get in the way. It happens to all of us. If you are new to WLM, it can be challenging to manage all this because fueling his sexual energy is not something your used to doing. It is a new focus for you and requires forming new habits and routines. It can be challenging also because the effects on him of not doing it are not always visible to you. You can't see the struggles for attention and craving to be dominated and controlled that he is wresting with inside his mind and so for you it easy for all this to be out of sight, out of mind. To get the most out of your WLM, that traditional way of thinking needs to change. You need to be tuned into his sexual energy and always be monitoring and managing it. A few days missed is not a big deal. When it turns to weeks, the husband usually starts to lose focus and become frustrated or depressed and that's when the bad behavior or laziness starts.
If you struggle to keep up with managing his sexual energy (I did for many years), the key is to set the goal of doing it and never lose sight of the goal. Establishing routines also helps you stick with it. Stay in tune with your husband's attitude and behavior. If you notice you are losing some of the warmth from the fire, then do something to fuel it back up again. There were many times with Thomas, where I almost let the fire go out and when I realized that, it upset me. What I learned is that with submissive men (or at least with Thomas), it is so easy to ignite the fire again. One moment of domination and it's like pouring kerosene on the hot ashes. Instantly the flames rise up and his submissive fire is burning hot again, like nothing ever changed. If you find yourself in a situation where things are going south because you've not been dominant or sexual for sometime, no worries. Spend a night being dominant with him and re-iterating your expectations of his obedience to you and he will be thrilled and right back under your thumb!
Concluding Thoughts And Call To Action
In a traditional marriage, sex is an event and masturbation is left unchecked. There is no attention paid by the wife to the constant sexual energy that flows within her husband. What makes a WLM, different is that the wife recognizes this sexual energy and takes control of it in order to mold him into an obedient and loyal submissive. Sex for the submissive man is not just an event. It is special privilege that must be earned and is managed by the wife. Sex to the submissive man evolves into something completely different. His sexual pleasure comes from being controlled, being mentally fucked, and pleasuring and obeying her. That is his sex. It is constant arousal with a few burst of intense pleasure thrown in every now then. The submissive man does not have physical sex and orgasm as much as a man in a traditional marriage but his sex life is much better and more intense because his wife is constantly stoking his arousal and sexual energy. Most guys that experience this never want to go back to the traditional way.
For all my fellow Goddesses out there, if you have not done so already, take control of your man's orgasms right now and put a stop to his uncontrolled masturbation. This will focus his attention on you. Manage his orgasms and don't let his sexual energy go to waste. Invest time into it to gain control over him so that you can benefit from his submissive needs and desired. He will love it and you will have him wrapped around your finger.
-Mz Kaylee
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As a male, single, masturbating got me through alot. I was seeing women, my age, older (enjoy older) but there were times. The older lady I was seeing lived in the apartment below, in her 50's, I in my 20's. I would just walk into her place without knocking and she did the same at mine. Our sex life was good, she taught me alot. It was when she walked in, It was Saturday morning, I was sitting on the toilet masturbating, naked and she caught me. Thought so she said, Sorry I said sitting there, Going to be Sorry she said. I was not done, she told me to stand up, hands away from my little toy. When I need is at my place and with a grip on my arm, my erection sticking out, was taken down the stairs to her place, thankful no one saw me. Get to the bathroom and get in the tub she said, kneel. I looked at her, finish what you started, I looked at her, NOW, and I stroked while she watched and when I finally cum got out of the tub, she cleaned the tub and then with a wash cloth clean me also very rough. So your going to be sorry now, and what followed was a spanking, over her lap, hairbrush applied, and when she stopped, she was not done, she took me back to my apartment, had me stand facing the wall. Well others heard my spankings, and soon four ladies had seen me standing facing the wall with a red bottom. Very nice, how long will you have him face the wall one asked. Well I'm not done with his punishment so have not decided. I dreaded not done with my punishment.
ReplyDeleteGreat read as always, thanks. And if I were to come with an instruction manual, this is exactly what it would say. I recognize myself completely. My wife usually have this periods that last 1-2 weeks. I feel depressed, stressed and frustrated in a very negative way. I tell myself to have patience and understanding and believe me I try. But at some point my emotions get uncontrollable with a desperate need for attention. It probably sound worse than it is, but just when we are in tune, everything feels so right.
ReplyDeleteAnyway, thanks again for the read. :)
// AA
This is a common situation so you are not alone. Submissive desires are very addictive and often a never ending craving for men. For most women, on the other hand,being dominant is not a craving and is not always a priority. You have to have patience and also find the right balance that both people can live with. Don't be afraid to let your wife know how you are feeling. Thanks for sharing. I am sure many others relate to what you shared.
DeleteI've felt similar ways when it seems like I'm not directed. I keep up with what I should be doing and remind myself I shouldn't be selfish. Always keep encouraging
DeleteIt's also the feeling of being torned between that my submission should be unconditional and the fact that it's not entirely so. We are making progress, and my wife knows how I feel. Babysteps, thats my motto and we hopefully have many years ahead to continue working on this. Either way it's something we both want and it makes us happy.
Delete/AA
Same here, it has its challenges but we're better off this away. Remembering that this isn't about me, and not to be selfish for attention helps.
DeleteKeep up the good work
Thank you for this. My submission cannot come solely from myself, it needs some involvement from her. A bit of positive reinforcement is always welcome. Saying "no" once a week is not enough, even after 2 months :) Your blog is the only source that she will read without prompting from me. While she will probably never comment, she has bookmarked your site. So again, Thanks.
ReplyDeleteYes, it is a two-way street. I am happy to hear that your wife is reading my posts. My primary goal with this blog is to help other women understand the dynamics of submissive men so that they can be successful and happy with leading a WLM.
DeleteMz Kaylee,
ReplyDeleteYou certainly have a keen insight into the submissive male mind. This is exactly how I think. Stopping me from orgasming on my own was the key to controlling me. With the exception of two supervised sessions it has been over nine years since I have gotten myself off. It blows my mind how easily I gave it up and how badly I still want to do it.
Wood on the fire is a great analogy, I call it the "million little things". All the small interactions that happen regularly that remind me of my place. She simply has to add the word "now" at the end of telling me to do something and I know I need to stop what I am doing and do her task. If she explains something to me then adds "do you understand" she knows the standard answer will be "yes, ma'am". I think at the start of a WLM the wife is really unaware how important these small interactions are to keeping us submissive. Having several daily chores also keep me excited. She has made it easier on her self just by making me have to keep asking permission for certain things. When my conversation starts "may I" she often has a grin on her face. She has told me more than once " I love the power trip".
All this for the chance at a simple orgasm, who would have thought? Thank you for an other spot on post. Stay safe and take care- Alan
Thank you Alan and you are right about the "little" things. There are many dynamics that make a successful WLM. When they are all humming together naturally it is magical and exciting.
DeleteGreat points Alan
DeleteI think I have similar motivations. The excitement in chores is real! Also having a goddess to please
A wonderful post! I think this perfectly describes the core of most FLRs - certainly the one my wife and I share!
ReplyDeleteTen years back, we were just as you describe - married awhile, my wife was less interested in sex and I was off pleasing myself - sometimes daily.
I knew I didn't want that to go on forever - I wanted us to reconnect. I was researching Tantra when I came upon orgasm control, devotional sex, and FLR.
I asked my wife to take control of my ejaculations, and over time, she did! And everything happened as you describe - I'm still completely enthralled by her, and putty in her hands!
I must confess, I do edge sometimes (even while reading Femdom Tank!) but I never climax. It's good practice for our lovemaking!
All couples should try this!
CK
Yes, I know you guys can't keep your hands off that thing between your legs. The only way to prevent it is chastity and even then I know you guys find ways to tease yourself. It's ok though, because you are just torturing yourself and keeping yourself horny for her. I know Thomas edges himself too. I love that he gets erections all day but is not allowed to cum. He's allowed to edge himself as long as he does not cum.
DeleteHi. Thank you for all the great entries in this blog. So much great info. You mention on this entry and others about forbidding male masturbation and orgasm without permission from the wife. In the reply above you mention that your husband edges himself. Is that different from masturbation? Do you allow him to edge or masturbate as long as he doesn't have an orgasm? If so is that an open invitation for him anytime?
DeleteThe difference is that he has my permission to stroke and edge and he is not allowed to orgasm without my permission. I do not restrict when he can do it except that he can not do it openly when I am around. It has to be on his time, which leaves very little opportunity for him.
DeleteSomeone's I think it's more of a pleasant massage really vs trying or wanting to cum.
DeleteI wonder if the guys like having a erections randomly throughout the day vs none?
In the beginning this was the rule I had. Edge all you want, just no orgasm without permission. About three or four months of that and I went too far and couldn't stop. I moped around racked with guilt until I finally confessed. A few hours later I was told from now on you will ask permission to touch yourself at all. It has been this way since then. She makes me use the phrase "may I play with myself", which I still find totally humiliating as a grown man to have to ask my wife this. It brings on super submissive feelings. Take care-Alan
DeleteI love the new rule Alan. When you are alone, are you able to not touch yourself? I can't imagine that a guy can really not touch himself, especially if he is being denied. I could be wrong though.
DeleteHey there Alan,
DeleteThat's quite a challenge and dilemma you're in. I had that issue too and just had to stop. Edging myself made the torture and temptation too great.
It took a while but it's not so much an issue anymore. I don't touch anymore like that since it puts me all the closer to cumming.
She took this a step farther a few years later. She said I was distracted during sex and didn't want me to touch myself when we were having sex. After catching me a couple of times she decided that I would always wear my cage when we had sex. She said "I'll tell you when and if you can take it off". Lately it has been employed a lot; the reason she is not revealing, maybe she thinks I am behind her back. To answer your question, I'll admit I am guilty of rubbing myself through my pants or underwear from time to time, but full fledged edging I always ask. If she reads the comments section you will have gotten me in trouble admitting that. She read your last post and told me "she is so spot on I find it funny that she could be talking about you". Take care-Alan.
DeleteHey there Alan
DeleteI hope I'm not getting you into trouble. Although I hoped she may consider setting up a profile like you did so it may be easier to reach her more directly. I thought she had some good ideas.
I did wonder overall, if women ever have any need for cocks if they're mostly receiving oral. Is that what she may think?
Or if you or her stay mostly clothed on?
When my wife wants me to eat her, she never touches my cock and doesn't have a need for it. But then again, she never touches it. I wonder if being in a cage may be better. Maybe blocks temptation to touch yourself?
It seems like she has her ways of keeping you in control.
Hope to hear from both of you soon
As I've shared before, my wife takes exception to the "too much restriction can demotivate" theory. While she has allowed me a handful of orgasms over the past 5 years or so, she decided that giving in to my annoying behavior patterns when I craved release sent the wrong signal and indeed enabled the very behavior she wants to eliminate. I've learned to keep this in check, and oddly enough masturbation has been easier to abstain from too as she would perceive any slack in my desire. The hardest part remained at night, after attending to her, and as I've also shared this ultimately lead to me losing my spot in our (her) bed. But in terms of losing motivation, I'm not sure I buy that. I have no choice but to remain motivated, because what is the alternative? I've been on the receiving end of it enough times to know that I need to keep her happy at all costs, even if that means barely if ever orgasming.
ReplyDeleteHey Tim
DeleteI also get "scolded" simply I'd my behavior is not pleasant. You're right, what else can you do?
Do you think you'll make it back to her bed?
I havent orgasmed in soon almost a year. Attending to her sexually while even remaining locked in my chastity device is a far more exciting experience for me.
Delete/AA
Tim -Your wife is right that giving in to annoying behavior can enable the bad behavior. It is something that Women need to be aware of. To be clear, I am not implying that the wife should always give an orgasm when annoying behavior occurs. There have been times when Thomas became very needy for my attention and I've opted to punish Thomas or send him away and order him to adjust his attitude. My advice to women, still stands that they need to monitor and manage their husband’s sexual energy and orgasms. There are times where I sense that Thomas’s behavior is being impacted by his pent-up sexual energy. There is nothing wrong with a wife making the decision to allow an orgasm to relieve that tension. What is important is that it is the wife’s decision and not the husband’s. Orgasm control includes both denying orgasm and giving permission to orgasm. Both actions are powerful for the woman when done appropriately. For those newer to orgasm denial, giving permission to orgasm is needed more frequently. It takes lots of practice and conditioning for a guy to build-up to longer term denial. Orgasm denial has a deep impact on a guy’s emotional state and this should not be ignored. You are experienced with orgasm denial and in a mature WLM so your situation is much different than someone new to orgasm denial or a couple that is early in their WLM. For some guys, a lack of orgasms does cause emotional stress and can be de-motivating and so my message to women is that they need to be aware of this and not ignore the signs.
DeleteThe underlying message from your wife is very important-that women need to ensure the actions they take are not enabling bad behavior. It is a challenging line to walk for women when they are new to WLM but experienced leaders like you wife understand it well and so for your situation, her thought process makes sense and I agree with how she is responding. Thank you for sharing your experience and your wife’s advice.
Do you ever allow your husband to have sex with you but not allow him to orgasm?
DeleteMz Kaylee,
Delete"My advice to women, still stands that they need to monitor and manage their husband’s sexual energy and orgasms."
I agree and I'm doing monitoring with my husband more now. As I commented, I decided to drop giving my husband ruined orgasms. My intention isn't to give Phil more frequent orgasms, however. The number of orgasms he gets, as well as treat for something special like an anniversary or vacation, work well to keep his submissive feelings warm. My purpose is to give my husband full orgasms because at his age I worry about him having prostate issues. They are common as a man get into his mid and late 50s, so his pipes deserve to get cleaned out thoroughly even if they aren't cleaned out frequently. I don't give advice to other women as to how they should treat a submissive man, but personally I believe his prostate health is something I have to consider. What I have impressed on my husband is that he has been given a gift, a privilege, by me. I told him, "What Mistress has granted can be taken away just as easily. I better not see any increase in bad behavior." I made him wear a rarely used leather penis harness that straps around his manhood at the first sign of misbehavior when he was loud and short with me. He wore it for about two hours. When he told me it was a little uncomfortable I told him he might find himself wearing it for the day if he sasses me again after I was nice enough to eliminate ruined orgasms. In fact, I teased him verbally about how his wife can put his cock into a sling whenever she wants and about how his "men friends would be so impressed if they knew that." I was feeling a bit cruel but it was a good way to get through to him and inflict a mild but meaningful punishment. Although I'm never quite sure where punishment stops and pleasure begins with my husband. He might dislike something as it happens, but he can get turned on about it later.
Regards,
Joan
Joan - sounds like a good plan and I think keeping his health in mind is wise. The punishment dynamic is an interesting one. My husband will get aroused at the moment I tell him what his punishment is and I also believe that similar to your husband, he will get aroused afterward when he thinks about it. My take on this is that being punished is a very extreme domination moment in which I am exerting full power over him and he is yielding to it. This creates strong submissive feelings for him, which ignites his arousal. The punishment is not arousing but it's the power exchange that arouses him.
DeleteI'm curious how you ladies figure out the balance of punishment vs pleasure when you give it? I imagine the purpose of the punishment must be met? If not, then it's not so much a punishment, right? Maybe I'm interpreting punishment with a form of pain.
DeleteAlso regarding Tim's post,
DeleteThere also seems to be a balance or dynamic regarding when an orgasm is due or simply a behavior attitude must be made/addressed. Is there any standard or is it just by knowing how a husband's normal behavior deviates beyond what should be allowed. Maybe it's a little tricky to determine
Mike- There is no balance to figure out when giving a punishment. A punishment is given when disobedience occurs and it should not be pleasurable. I am not thinking about his pleasure when I am giving a punishment. However, the very act of punishing usually creates arousal for the submissive. Regarding when an orgasm is due, it varies based on what the wife wants. There is no one right way to do it. Some couples have regular scheduled orgasms, some women tie it to good behavior or completing certain tasks, and for other women it is completely random. I take the random approach with my husband. He has no idea when I will allow an orgasm and often times it is a last second decision for me. I think it is more fun that way and keeps him on his toes. Usually it's a few months between orgasms for him but sometimes I will give him 2 or 3 orgasms in the same month just to change things up and keep him guessing when the next one will come.
DeleteI see. Thanks.
DeleteMaybe I'm thinking perhaps on an extreme punishment. Some form a wife would choose to ensure there is no pleasure resulted?
I imagine if the punishment isn't severe enough, the husband may simply enjoy it too a certain degree? Or easily tolerate it I suppose.
Just a thought.
A second question,
Is it ever an idea for a wife to extend the denial period either because the husband is responding well or maybe as a punishment?
I imagine over time, it becomes easier for the man to go longer periods of no orgasm. And does well doing so. I was wondering if that's ok to do. If a man does well denied 2 weeks, can she push it out 5 weeks etc. And build upon it?
Thanks again!
Mike, in my case she has me on about every six weeks. She has me keep track on a phone app. I missed making the bed once and she let it go. A few days later I missed again and at supper that night she said “ maybe your thinking about your next orgasm so much you can’t keep your mind on your chores”. “ I think skipping your next one will help you concentrate”. True to her word a few nights later we had sex and no mention of the cage coming off. So I think she gets me used to a certain time frame and then it’s a punishment when it does happen when you think it will.-Alan
DeleteMike - I hope so but not sure at this point what would cause her to change her mind. It's been many months, she says she sleeps better, likes that I'm able to wake earlier and/or go to sleep later than her in order to do more chores, etc. She has more closet space and bathroom space, as all of my items were moved out. When I last asked (begged?) she made reference to all of the above, and even added that my constant morning erections were the last straw for her. Advice anyone?
ReplyDeleteWould it change if she didn't feel your erections? I'm guessing that's what was irritating her?
ReplyDeleteDo you like sleeping in the other room?
Sounds good you're being productive though. I bet she loves that
she does love it...I literally do every single thing now (aside from cooking, which she enjoys). The main thing is she sleeps better without me, she says. I don't particularly like our arrangement, but at the same time there is some thrill to the humiliation of an almost nightly routine of rubbing her feet, giving her oral and then quietly leaving the room with a hard on. I suppose that's why I put up with it. It's just the line between husband and maid feels really blurred because of it. If I at least shared her bed, even without sex, I think I'd feel a little more like a true husband.
DeleteHey Tim
DeleteIt does sound like you have some nice perks. She has you trained well.
Maybe if you don't poke her with the erection seems to be a way to go? Or maybe ask " what can I possibly do to..." Or " if I behave, can we try once?"
Oh and I like that you're able to give her oral every night. Does it ever go beyond that?
DeleteAnd does she have you on an orgasm schedule?
Mike, no schedule (I wish). Just every six months or so, on average it seems. It goes "beyond that" quite often, she'll have me use my hands or some toys she has on her too. She's very direct and matter of fact of what she wants and I follow her directions. After it's generally another foot rub until she's asleep, at which point I'm to leave her room quietly.
DeleteI do like when my wife is direct too on what she wants. Seems like it can be enjoyable and simple at the same time with the nightly rituals.
DeleteDoes she have a need for your cock? Or always oral given to her?
6 months is a goal maybe I can reach one day. I'm guessing it's not too difficult to keep?
Keep up the good work!
Beautiful wisdom from mz Kaylee. Who else can write so sagely, almost saxredly, about this topic? -- Frank L
ReplyDeleteResponding to the anonymous question "Do you ever allow your husband to have sex with you but not allow him to orgasm?" Yes, That's pretty much how it happens most of the time during sex. It is rare that he gets to orgasm during sex. It is actually a great thrill for him to give me an orgasm during sex, while he is denied.
ReplyDeleteAnd it's incredible! :)
DeleteHello Mz Kaylee.
ReplyDeleteI am sure that most women would find it impossible to believe that a man can actual enjoy being denied while finding tremendous satisfaction in bringing his wife to an orgasm ! Such is the life of a submissive ! While my wife has no desire or understanding of the lifestyle I still long to be in submission to her.
This is one of your best posts ever . Your comments on male Masturbation weigh heavy but are true especially for younger men. I believe It is the extreme need and desire for sex that drive men into submission to their wives . The “ slow burn “ provides a safe haven for his desires far beyond the occasional orgasm .
Take care
John Dalton
WOW! So much wisdom concentrated in a post! Thank you, Mz Kaylee! This is the type of things every Wife/husband should know. As I read the whole article, I just think it's perfect. W/we and many people I know apply 100% to what you say.
ReplyDeleteAwesome article, can't stop re-reading it!
ReplyDeleteNot sure if it needs to be added, but one point that could be helpful for some wives is to know that the masturbating married man feels terrible doing so: the act itself feels nice but before/after feels wrong. So wrong that he would probably flat lie/deny it if called out.
If he is blocked you can reinforce the message that you as a wife are the only good way to release all his energy. "Being good" is a great motivator for many of us. For me, the transition after a marriage crisis was when she started reinforcing that she was the only good way to channel my energy, then reinforced it while having sex, and that was my main motivation to stop fooling and focus totally on her which opens me and fires my submission.