The Power and Pleasure of ‘No’

 

‘No’ is a powerful word. When used it is an act of authority or an act of defiance. It is a word that almost always creates emotion and reaction in others.  It can make someone stressed, angry, happy, or even excited. For the dominant Female, ‘No’ should be viewed as a tool to use in exerting her control over her submissive partner.

My favorite use of the word is when Thomas asks for permission to orgasm. He only asks this question when he is fully-aroused and on the verge orgasm. For him to reach that point, he has spent several minutes enjoying the pleasure of my teasing, or if he is lucky, the pleasure of being inside of me. He has also spent the last part of those minutes struggling not to cum and struggling in his mind whether to ask for permission to orgasm or to try to hold onto the pleasure for a few seconds longer. When he has reached the point where he asks (or sometimes begs) for permission to orgasm, I know he is at his wits end and desperate for release and it so powerful and fun to simply say ‘No.’ One would think this response results in disappointment and frustration. Not in the case of my husband…well maybe sometimes that is the result, but most times the denial from me ignites his arousal even more and his body tenses and he struggles hard not to orgasm even though I have stopped touching him. Such fun and excitement for the both us.  I do believe Thomas enjoys the ‘No’ more than the ‘Yes.’ I sure hope so because he does not get many yes’s!

There are many obvious situations in which the dominant wife uses ‘No.’ You know those times- when he is whining, trying to get out of chores, or just asking stupid questions. No! No! and No! Each time you tell him ‘No,’ you are exerting your authority and tapping into his submission. I recommend that as the dominant partner, you purposely tell your husband ‘No’ from time to time, just to exert your power over him. For example, my husband needs to ask permission to go out with his friends. If he is not in good standing with me, he pretty much knows the answer is going to be no. It’s actually quite cute when he asks me half heartedly because he knows what I am going to say. That is power!  However, there are also times when he is in good standing and I still say ‘No’ simply to exert my power and remind him of his place at my feet. This brings disappointment for him and maybe even a twinge of anger but he knows not to react negatively or there will be consequences. This is all part of the deal and commitment he agreed to when he asked me to take control of him so long ago. Using the ‘No’ like this is, every now and then, is healthy and beneficial to the WLM. It reinforces your power over him and brings reality to his submission, which brings out deep submissive emotions within him. Some guys will feel the submissive rush instantly and may even get aroused on the spot. Other guys may experience feelings of anger but once the anger subsides, those submissive emotions arise after it sinks in that they are being controlled and dominated. Remember ladies, submissive guys crave the feeling of being controlled and dominated. The more real it is, the more exciting and long-lasting the rush. Telling them ‘No,’ making them work extra hard for you, and putting them under stress ever now and then, brings out their deep submissive emotions.

‘No’ can also be fun and sexy in the bedroom. Having him beg to pleasure you over and over again while you tell him no, can be fun. We all know that when you forbid something from someone, it makes them want it more. When, or if, you say ‘Yes,’ he will be so eager to please you. What’s even more fun is to tell him ‘No’ and then redirect him to something else.  For example, if he asks, “may I please lick your nipples,’ you can reply, ‘No, but you can get on your knees and kiss my feet.’ Once he complies, what I like to do is spout of additional orders before he can gather his thoughts. ‘good boy…..keep kissing them….put your hands behind your back…..that’s it….now kiss my thighs….” Using this technique is a great way to take complete control of him and keep him focused purely on pleasing you.

I hope this article has been thought provoking for you.  I challenge to tell your husband ‘No’ tonight and redirect him to serving you.  Please share his reaction and how things went.

-Mz Kaylee.