Several of the topic suggestions from my last post were related to the 24/7 Wife Led Marriage (WLM) lifestyle and how it works. There are many facets to the lifestyle and addressing them all in one post is not possible. My blog is a good resource for learning about the lifestyle so if you are interested in how it works, then it is worth your time to go back and read the older posts. In this post I will touch on some of the key aspects. For many of you a WLM is a fantasy and may seem like it could never be reality. Others may view WLM as crazy and not realistic. I absolutely can relate, because I remember reading about the lifestyle when I was younger and thinking the same things. I am here now to tell you it is possible and it is very practical. When both partners are committed to the WLM it is an excellent form of marriage that encourages communication, reduces conflict, and creates and strong emotional bond between husband and wife. I have experienced all of those benefits and many of the readers of this blog have also expressed that they have experienced the same benefits in their WLM.
When I take a step back and look at what goes on in my WLM, it seems very crazy. 10 years ago, I would have never guessed that I would be punishing my husband, controlling when he can orgasm, making him wear panties, sending him to the corner, and expecting him to do almost all the chores. I would have never imagined that I would be getting massages from him several time a week, and that he would be giving me baths and fetching things for me without question or hesitation. 10 years ago, that all seemed like extreme domination and fantasy to me. Fast forward to today and when I am in the moment it feels so normal to me and it works very well for us. Our marriage is strong and we are having a ton of fun together. Now I could not imagine going back to the "vanilla" lifestyle.
The 24/7 WLM lifestyle is most definitely possible but it requires commitment from both the husband and wife. Everything is not going to suddenly fall into place and work perfectly, when you both decide you want to do it. Establishing the WLM is easy; getting it to the point where things are humming along great is a journey with many ups and downs and twists and turns. At least that has been my experience. Like most new things you try in life, it takes time, experience, and trail and error to get comfortable with it and good at it. For example, most people are not going to be able to pick up a golf club and hit the ball straight and far right away. Their first game of golf will probably be terrible. Some people may learn quickly and love the game right away. Many others will take several years to get good at it, and may even get frustrated and give it up a few times along the way and then come back to it later. However, once they hit that perfect shot for the first time, there is great joy, and when they start to see their balls going straighter more often, their confidence builds and there is motivation to keep playing. You can expect similar experiences and emotions when building a WLM.
The Day-to-Day Life in a 24/7 WLM
The daily life of a WLM can vary significantly from couple-to-couple. It largely depends on how the wife wants to lead the relationship and how committed the husband is to making it work. Other variables such as, the maturity of the relationship, whether there are kids in the house, and work/family demands, affect how the WLM operates. My WLM certainly has changed over time and is much different now then when I first started.
The WLM lifestyle for most people is not about the wife exerting extreme control over the husband every day. She is not dressing in leather every day or forcing him to be naked and collared all of the time. She is not barking orders at him 24/7 and constantly punishing him. Perhaps some people live like that but the vast majority of us can not feasibly live like that and do not want that everyday. It is tiring and non-productive. The key to the long-term WLM, is to blend the control and submissive aspects into every day life. I've written more about this in my post "Creating a Productive Environment for YourSubmissive:" https://www.blogger.com/blog/post/edit/1938012059034696763/5367148811547645825
For the lifestyle to be sustainable, there also needs to be commitment from the husband to serve, obey, and yield to his wife's authority. If he is not willingly yielding to her and accepting her authority over him, even when he does not agree or like the outcome, then it create un-needed tension that strains the relationship. Likewise. the wife needs to be committed to leading the marriage in the best interest of the couple. This means taking into consideration the husband's needs and desires when making decisions. The wife also has the responsibility of actively leading the WLM by setting clear expectations for the husband, implementing rules and routines for him, monitoring his performance, incorporating regular discipline and rewards for him, and if needed punishment to hold him accountable. A successful WLM takes effort and sacrifice to be sustainable. It does not just happen on its own.
Benefits of WLM
The good news is that when both spouses are committed and fully engaged in the WLM principles, there are many benefits. The marriage becomes stronger, the couple grows closer together, there is better communication and less conflicts, and their happiness increases. Another fantastic benefit is that the house is always clean! For the wife, the effort she puts into leading, results in a much higher standard of living, She is being served and pampered and does not have to be bothered with boring mundane tasks and chores. She gets pleasured whenever and however she wants and sex and foreplay are primarily focused on her. Perhaps the biggest benefit of all, is that she gets what she wants and lives like a Queen and Goddess. If you are a female that is just starting out in the lifestyle, you may not be experiencing all these benefits yet, but over time with proper training and discipline of your husband, you will get there.
The husband benefits by getting to live out his submissive fantasy in real life, which helps to satisfy his submissive craving. His submission toward his wife also creates a sense of fulfillment and purpose within, which makes the experience incredibly rewarding and satisfying. It is a much deeper satisfaction than engaging in pornography or with a dominatrix or online mistress. An unexpected benefit that my husband has mentioned, is that he feels like a more productive person because of all that he accomplishes through obeying me. The WLM can also reduce stress and improve the overall well-being of the husband because submissive individuals thrive in environments where there are clear expectations and they are told what to do. Finally, even though the submissive may be denied orgasm regularly, his sex life becomes better and more active in a WLM. This is because he learns to experience pleasure in new ways. Those who discover the pleasure of being teased and denied, experience an entirely new level of arousal, and often prefer denial over orgasm. His sex life also improves because the wife learns to incorporate more teasing and sexual motivators into the marriage.
Making it Work
Just like other relationships, the WLM takes effort and sacrifice to make it work. There could be days or even weeks where there is no overt domination. However, those days and weeks are filled with subtle domination and lots of expectations and rules. Every day, the submissive operates within these rules and expectations with the intent to please his wife. He knows that he will be held accountable if he does not follow the rules or meet expectations. Contrary to what many may think, the husband makes decisions in a WLM. It is not practical or convenient to restrict decisions. However, his decision-making is done with his wife's needs, desires, and expectations in mind. Poor decisions or inappropriate decision- making are subject to punishment or discipline. When presented with a decision, it is incumbent on the husband to exercise common sense in determining which decisions he has authority to make and which decisions need the approval of his wife or should be referred to his wife. He also understands that his wife has the final say in all decisions, regardless of his opinion, and he willingly accepts this and yields to her.
The WLM incorporate non-traditional methods such as orgasm control, punishment, rewards, discipline, training, and sexual domination. Those are some examples. There are many more approaches that are effective for a WLM and not all couples will employ all strategies. As noted earlier in the post, different approaches appeal to different people and you should use what works best for your relationship. The non-traditional methods are important strategies that teach the husband how to properly serve his wife, motivate the husband to serve and please her, and deter him from bad habits and bad behavior. These strategies should exist in both new and mature WLMs. I also encourage females to delve into the more fun and kinky aspects of female domination as these can be mind blowing experiences and great motivators for the husband. Surprisingly, a few of the kinky experiences with my husband have been the most intimate and "soul connecting" moments with him. I know I am not alone in experiencing this. Over the years, many readers have shared similar experiences with me. Hopefully this is enough to convince some of you to let your inhibitions go and try something kinky and fun.
To sum it all up, the 24/7 WLM is sustainable over the long-term when both wife and husband are committed to making it work, incorporate the dynamic into their day-to-day life, and find the right balance of control and domination that works for them. If you are thinking about a WLM or new to it, I want you to know that it is a fantastic lifestyle. It takes a lot of effort, communication, and trial and error to get it running smoothly, but once you get there, it is fantastic! I will also add that the journey to get there is an amazing learning experience that helps you both grow as individuals.
-Mz Kaylee
