Personally, I like dominating a “manly man”
It seems as if many husbands in Wife-Led Marriages have a desire
to be feminized in their submissiveness, and many wives enjoy doing so. That
works in many marriages, and that’s fine. While we do a little of that in our
marriage, we mostly avoid it. I want my submissive husband to be as manly as
possible; it excites me to have power over a “manly man,” rather than over a
feminized one.
My husband is much taller than me and much stronger. And yet I can
snap my fingers and make him do my bidding. That’s sexy!
I like my husband to dress as a man, for instance. He does not
wear panties or other women’s clothes. I do take off my panties and put them in
his mouth as a gag when he is making noise while being punished, but I don’t
see that as feminizing behavior. I’m gagging him with my scent, which turns us
both on.
He does clean the house at night with just an apron on – but it’s
a man’s apron and I quite enjoy seeing it “tent” in the front because of the
erection he has while doing my bidding. And watching the cute bare ass that I
have reddened.
I do lock up my man’s cock while he is not in my presence, but to
me that is just me exerting my power over him because I know he is so filled
with testosterone that he can’t help but masturbate when given the opportunity!
In other words, he is being manly to a fault!
I like my husband to have stubble on his face; I think it’s sexy.
I like when he growls at me in bed and acts dominate during intercourse (when I
allow it). I don’t peg him, either, as that definitely puts him in a feminized
role. To me it’s more exciting to unlock him and drive him absolutely crazy by
playing with his big cock without letting him come. He’s a man with a huge
erection that is totally under my control! He begs me to come and promises all
sorts of things … and I usually say NO! Oh, the power!
I like the idea of a husband who is wrapped around my little
finger, but I am not making him into an imitation of
a female. To me, vanilla wives aren’t expected to act the way I make him act –
totally submissive and obedient. A wife would have to be a true submissive to
act that way. I don’t see it as a female role; it’s a submissive role.
I like that he is my manly husband who succumbs to my amazing
female power!
-Trina
We are all different Trina and that is wonderful. My wife has no desire to be a leather clad Mistress wielding a whip and nor does she want to cuckold me, despite my lack of size and prowess in the marital bed. For my part I have always known I was a sissy but I have no desire to kneel before a man and give him a blowjob or offer a man my backside, which seems to be the fundamental stereotype for a sissy. We are what we are and we have to be prepared to compromise also. I love serving my wife and dream of doing it dressed as a maid, but it's not what my wife wants so I don't do it. Those of us who are fortunate to live in a wife led marriage find our balance and we get on with it. Sissy Jenna
ReplyDeleteI believe there are two types of male who seek a relationship involving loving female discipline, the alpha male and the beta male.
ReplyDeleteIn reality I think such men actually fall along a continuum from most alpha to most beta. But for the sake of having a coherent dialog, let’s say every male tends to fall into one of these two categories. Similarly ,dominant women probably have preferences along this same continuum, alpha to beta.
The existence of these two type of males and the different preferences of dominant women tends to create some faux disagreements and even confusion among those in a DD female led relationship –should I spank him when he is naughty, should he be feminized, does grounding work, etc.
I call these “faux” because they get expressed as if there was only one type of submissive male when in fact there are at least two ( alpha and beta) . And the answer to these sorts of questions depends very much on where on the alpha –beta continuum that male is.
For example as an alpha male myself,spanking or the credible threat of it is extremely effective as discipline and behavior management for me; but clearly there are many males unlike me who either don’t respond to spanking, would resent it, or don’t need it to obey and behave.
And there are women like Trina who prefers a male who needs a firm hand just as other women prefer a male more readily managed. There is no one way here, and understanding female led relationships is hindered by talking as if there were.
It’s an FLR if you have to spank him but it’s also still an FLR if you never spank him
Alan
Take it from me and I'm sure Tony would echo this sentiment (Trina can confirm, I'm sure) that grounding does indeed work. Especially the way my wife and Trina does it. I'd take a spanking in a heartbeat and it is easily the worst punishment in Hazel's arsenal.
Delete- Trent
So an alpha male doesn't want to be feminized but a beta male does? I don't buy that. Or is it some other point you are making?
DeleteTrina
Alan - I agree with Trina. I think you are spot on that different approaches work for different people and that men fall on a wide spectrum between beta and alpha. However, I don't see any connections between Apha/Beta and what approaches work for each. There are many other variables that play into what works and does not work for the couple. Spanking, feminization, humiliation, etc. can be effective for both beta and alpha men. What is actually effective for the individual and couple depends a lot on their individual preference and emotional state of mind.
DeleteMz Kaylee
DeleteI agree with you entirely. Both Alpha and Beta males can and do respond to an enormous range of approaches and nothing that I said precludes any of them.
But I don’t understand at all what Trina is saying, quote: “So an alpha male doesn't want to be feminized but a beta male does”
I didn’t say or imply anything like that, nor do I believe it the case.
In Fact quite the reverse. She is literally putting words in my mouth rather than reading carefully what I carefully wrote.
Alan
No, it also sounded to me like you were implying that certain methods worked for alphas and certain methods worked for betas. Why else would you introduce the concept of alpha and beta males into the discussion?
DeleteWell written post Trina and I enjoyed reading it. I really like your contrast and differing opinion. You and I are different, yet in a lot of the ways we are the same with what are enjoying in our respective relationships. Its nice to have yet another example that the FLR umbrella need not take just one shape and approach. We are all different in our kinks, turnons, and approaches to maintaining what we need and desire. One size should never fit all, it would be pretty boring if that was the case. Please keep your posts coming!
ReplyDeleteI agree AJ and feel the same. Trina - there is something very sexy about a manly succumbing to the power of a female. I enjoyed reading your description of that exciting dynamic. Where I differ from you is that even though I make my husband wear panties and sissy panties, I still view him as manly on the outside. I find it sexy to see the soft feminine and silky fabric against his hard body. Knowing that he is wearing them out of obedience to me is a sign of his submission to me. I've also discovered that there is some sort of magic in those panties in that when he slides them on for me, he gets aroused and becomes docile and submissive.
DeleteI also differ from many other dominant females in that I don't pursue the full feminization of my husband. I may push the boundary a bit every now and then just for fun (I have made him wear a bra once or twice in the past) but it's not an area of interest to me to do regularly.
This all just reinforces that there is a wide variety of choices and preferences for femdom/WLM and not all choices work for everyone. I enjoy reading about peoples different preferences and experiences and I hope more people share their stories her either through comments, guest posts, or through submitting a profile.
Let me speak up on behalf of us betas. For women like Trina, who enjoy the conquest of an alpha, I respect your choice.
ReplyDeleteBut for women who want a wife - someone to cook and clean, take care of the house and put out in bed, consider a beta. We are eager to please and require little maintenance. If you are a professional and need to concentrate on your career, a beta helpmate may be just what the doctor ordered.
Hi Mary
DeleteIt believe the differences need to be respected if they are going to be understood. Judging just from the femdom blogs I see, more dominate women seem to prefer beta males -- and speaking as an alpha male I can see why that could be the case. The point I have been making in my last several posts is that both beta and alpha males seek female led relationships and loving female authority Dominant women probably differ individually as to preference and style but the reality is that femdom relationships attract both types of male.
Alan
I have no problem with a career woman who wants a beta male wife. I personally like having a husband who brings home the bacon and cooks it too!
ReplyDeleteTrina,
ReplyDelete"I like my husband to have stubble on his face; I think it’s sexy." I like this too. I require my husband to shower and shave for his discipline sessions. It is a little extra control I exert. My husband is a manly guy. While I don't attempt to feminize him I do require him to wear panties and we do some anal play with butt plugs. I rather enjoy controlling him this way because he is manly. He began shaving his head because of normal hair loss, and it makes him look even more masculine and younger to me. So I began requiring him to keep his head shaved, especially when I schedule a discipline session. You mentioned your husband is kept in chastity when you are not around to control him. I will probably implement this process, since he is getting four orgasms this year and possibly only two next year. I always emphasize that none of our femdom fun started with me. He requested it and loves it.
Joan
Joan - Similar to you my husband is required to be showered and clean shaven on both his face and balls for our weekly review session. He is also either naked or in panties and wearing a leather strap around the base of his cock. Most recently I added that he must put a collar around his neck. Requiring this preparation for him puts him in a submissive mindset before the session even begins.
DeleteMz Kaylee,
DeleteIt never ceases to amaze me that these naughty husbands actually like and encourage this. The leather strap and collar seem like nice additions to the whole discipline process.
Joan
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