Weekends for us are less structured then week days but I still have lots of tasks and expectations for Thomas. He is required to do a full house cleaning, which includes the bathrooms, vacuuming, and changing the sheets on the bed. He also takes care of the yard and gardens as needed, does the weekly grocery shopping and puts gas in my car. When he is doing the house chores on the weekend he is required to wear sissy maid panties and a cock strap. If the kids are out of the house, then he does the indoor chores in nothing but the panties. I love seeing him scurry around in them. If the kids are home, then he wears them under his clothes.
On weekends, I make him drive me around for any errands that I want to do. I may also send him on his own (in his errand outfit) to do errands. Less structure is needed because we may have kids activities to go to, social events, family events, or I may have errands to do. In general, I expect him to get the chores done by the end of the weekend regardless of the events of the weekend. However, there are times where I need to make exceptions because we are tied up for most of the weekend with social or famiy events. When that happens, he needs to finish up on Monday and he is required to wear the maid parities all day Monday.
It is fantastic for me as I get to relax on the weekend and may hang out with a few girl friends while he is working. We're a days trip to the beach so in the summer I may head to the beach for the day or weekend while he works. He may, with my permission, hang out with "the guys" on the weekends but he still needs to get his chores done. However, most of the time we do social events together. Sundays are typically reserved for ourselves so he turns down requests from his friends to hang out on Sunday.
Weekends are also when I do his weekly review, which incudes his maintenance corner time. His reviews are mostly positive, which is the way it should be. If your husband is not consistently doing well then that's a problem that needs to be solved. Weekends are also when I allow him to pleasure me. It's not to say that I never allow him to pleasure me during the week, but most of the time I am just too tired for it on a week night. When there is pleasure for me it usually includes teasing for him but sometimes I just want to be pleased! He gets such a thrill out of pleasuring me, that even if I don't touch him, he is fully aroused and loves it so do not have pity on him. It is a privilege for him to pleasure me.
I will indulge in kinky play every now and then on the weekends, but it is not too frequent. I just need to be in the right mood and often have to plan for it. Long weekends and vacations are always great for getting me in the kink mood. Although every once in awhile it just strikes me in the heat of the moment. Those are often the best times! Of course, kinky means different things for different people. A lot of what I do on a daily basis would be considered kinky to others but for us, it's not kink unless it's outside of the normal routine. There are many people who say kink is not needed in a WLM. The people who say that are usually the ones who are not getting it-lol! It's like saying you don't need an easy pass at the amusement park. Yeah- that's true, but when I do have easy pass, the experience is so much better!! So while it is true that you can have a good WLM without kink, I believe kink takes the WLM from good to awesome. It is fun and truly does motivate submissive guys and keep them happy!
Back to the topic of weekends.....My weekends are loosely structured but one thing I do my best to keep consistent is the weekly review and corner time. That's been a game changer in our relationship. It keeps us in tune with each other and helps recharge Thomas and keep him focused on me. I have learned that for the benefit of both him and I, it is better to do a short review than no review at all. If you miss one review, then it makes it easier to miss the next one, and next thing you no you are off track.
So there you have it - I've shared the typical week in my WLM. There certainly are many other rules and expectations that factor into it and there are always different activities and events that may require the structure to flex a bit, but hopefully you get the general idea of how it works. Some people run their WLMs in a more extreme way and others are less extreme. You have to do what works best for you!
What questions do you have?
-Mz Kaylee.
This is great!
ReplyDeleteI've been curious what's been going on in your life. Thanks for the insight.
I think that kink is fun, although we haven't incorporated much if it. Not that we don't need it, but I don't think we've explored or desired it perhaps.
Thomas is doing a great job serving you and keeping everything in order.
You've shared before. Would you be able to say how often intercourse happens? And are there weeks that go by you're not in the mood to be pleasured?
Thanks again!
It's typical that I allow him to pleasure me once a week. How he pleasures me varies between oral, using his fingers, and actual intercourse. It all depends on my mood. Most of the time it's oral. I could go months without actual intercourse (because he is pleasuring me in other ways) and there are times where we have intercourse several weeks in a row. Yes, there are times where I could go several weeks without him pleasuring me because I am just not in the mood or we are too busy. That has not been an issue lately with us being stuck at home due to the corona virus. We are in our 40s so our sex drive is not the same as a young couple (although I think the WLM has increased my sex drive) and so this frequency works well for us.
ReplyDeleteOne of the common themes I see in a lot of WLM is to make the husband cross dress. Except one time many years ago she made me put on her panties we have never partaken in this. Yesterday I was making the bed and admiring my wife as she pulled on a pink, very feminine looking sports bra. She turned from the mirror and said "do you like this", I said "yes". She continued "good because next time we have to have a correction session you will be wearing your cage and this". Lately she has made me strip down when she reprimands me. She also said I would be wearing it until the next day just to have some sympathy for how it feels for a women to have to wear one all day. I have to say when she said it I got aroused so somewhere deep down I want this. I guess I would like to hear some thoughts why this is such a common theme in femdom. I know from a comment Ms Kitty(Pudsweda) made to me that her husband enjoys wearing panties and she enjoys seeing a man in panties. For the wives who force their husband I would like to know what is their attraction to this.
Delete"forcing" him to wear panties was really a fantasy of his. It took me awhile to warm up to the idea. Once I started doing it, I saw that it had a big effect on him. It made him aroused and docile. Whenever he was in panties his submissive demeanor was strong and he was more obedient. I learned that they it was a form of control that helped meet his submissive desires. That is primarily why I do it. Not long ago, I got him a few pairs of sissy panties and I have to admit I do like the way they look on him. I like watching him do chores in them.
DeleteI'm sure I will also be "forced". Ha, I'm not fooling anybody. I will love the humiliation. The idea that my wife will see me in a position that I would not want anyone else in the world to see me in arouses me to no end. Now I'm worried about how far she will go with the feminization. Sorry, I forgot to sign the post above.-Alan
DeleteThank you for the wonderful insight MzKaylee. This post will be another one that gets printed, put into "the file" to be read to Mistress K. on Sunday morning. Sunday mornings is the time Mistress K. wants me to read to her the interesting blog posts I have come across during the week. Not surprisingly, the overwhelming majority of posts I have read to her have been from this blog.
ReplyDeleteShe just loves your practicable manner, your realness and your candor when it comes to how you lead your marriage and your husband. She has been inspired to incorporate some of the things you comment on. I find myself having way more daily chores than I ever did and have spent significantly more time naked, on my knees and in the corner than I ever have.
Our situation is much like your in that we have teenage kids in the house. They're older teenage kids and thus are away from the house more than younger kids so that problem is beginning to fix itself.
Mistress K. agrees with you in that she feels it is important to indulge in kinky behavior throughout the day/week/weekend. It really does act as true incentive in our WLM and of course, that benefits everyone involved. I'm sure there are exceptions, and to each their own, but pretty much every submissive husband in a loving WLM craves attention from his Mistress Wife in every form. It is an appreciated expression of her love for me when she will randomly walk up to me, give me a kiss and tell what a good boy I have been, or when she will call me into the bedroom at random times and make me produce an erection on the spot.
Thank you for all you do on this blog. You're an amazing inspiration to the person I love and adore most in this world.
Thank you subhub. I am glad to hear that your wife is getting value from my posts. Helping other women advance their WLM is the main reason I started this blog so it makes me feel good when I hear that other women are reading my posts. It is also nice and helpful to me to hear other women's thoughts so thank you for passing on some of things she shared with you.
DeleteI couldn't agree more sub hub, the reason my WLM mirrors Ms Kaylee's in so may ways is that we learned this dynamic from this blog. It's really a good way to introduce this lifestyle to your wife. It really shows how this can work in everyday life. It introduces the lifestyle in a very non-threatening way to a wife that is hesitant because she thinks it's all about whips and chains. Once my wife found out she wouldn't have to do anything that she was uncomfortable with she embraced it and loves being in charge. Thank you Mz Kaylee for making my fantasy come true. Take care-Alan
ReplyDeleteVery well said Alan.
DeleteMz Kaylee, were you/are you ever worried that your husband is "too" busy with chores (especially on the weekends) or have you worked that out? Also, how much do your girl friends know of your lifestyle, especially when you're with them and he's back at home? Would you ever consider having him do chores for them?
ReplyDeleteHe is in a good routine with the chores and handles them well. I did not assign them to him all at once. He would not have been able to handle that. Different chores were transitioned to him over many years. Once he would get into a good routine with existing chores, I would then train him on a new one. Also, as we got older and our lifestyle changed (e.g not going out to bars every weekend), he was able to take on more. I do not share the details of our lifestyle with others but they do notice that I call the shots and he obeys. The dynamic between us is impossible to hide. I have not considered loaning him out to do chores for others. Seems like it could be fun to do but I honestly do not know where he would find the time since he does so much for me.
DeleteThat's what my wife thought too but it's worked out so far; she basically took what she'd have me do on one of the weekend days and spread it out over the rest of the week (she has everything written down, basically in spreadsheet format). She also had me wake up one hour earlier than normal each day too. So that allowed me most if not all of the day at one of her friend's homes/apartments to clean. For her it's been great and a way to spend more time with friends, which especially these days is important to her.
DeleteMz Kaylee,
ReplyDeleteAs usual your post are honest and wonderful...
My question is at what point does your husband go from henpecked to a WLM. I suppose the dressing in a certain way, and knowing that certain task may be required (and a deadline exists).
I suppose that I am trying to figure out what the special elements are that cement the fact that the control and power belong to you.
With care,
robby.
"My question is at what point does your husband go from henpecked to a WLM. I suppose the dressing in a certain way, and knowing that certain task may be required (and a deadline exists)."
DeleteIf I may ... for me it was when I truly knew that my focused service and devotion that provides my wife genuine pleasure in hers, and that the genuine pleasure she experiences gives me immense pleasure, was the moment that our love, our sex, our marriage was not centered on my orgasm. As such, I have come to realize that the constant state of arousal and my blissful existence in a marriage with the woman I love more than anyone, is so much better that the fleeting few seconds of an orgasm for me.
I don't think that the normal sequence is henpecked > WLM. It wasn't for us.
DeleteA henpecked husband is unhappy, unfulfilled, and would rather be anywhere else.
In a WLM, the husband has sexualized the chores, the strictness, and yes, the infrequency of ejaculation, so that he's constantly enthralled by his loving wife. (See the 'Paradigm Shift' posts here.) I'd say the sequence is more often happy marriage > WLM.
CK
Similar to what CK said, my husband was never henpecked. Prior to WLM, we shared in the chore responsibility. The transition of chores to him was part of the WLM and it happened over many, many years. I did not just one day assign him every chore. The special element here is his acceptance that I am the one in control and that I have final say in all matters and my commitment to control him in a loving way that also appeals to his submissive desires. Without those elements, the WLM will not work.
DeleteWell now I know why men don’t get to orgasm much in femdom relationships. They need all that pent up motivation and energy to do all the chores, errands, cooking, lawn care and housework that is required of them. After all that plus working at my job I would be too tired to orgasm. Thomas is definitely a keeper.
ReplyDeleteNot sure if that was tongue in cheek, but you got it wrong.
DeleteYes, Thomas is a keeper. A lot comes down to perspective Frank. You are viewing chores as work. He is viewing chores as serving his Goddess and he gets pleasure from working hard to serve his Goddess. Keep in mind we are in a mature WLM. It was not like this in the beginning and I don't expect every WLM to mimic mine. A benefit he gets is that since I am not bogged down with chores, I have more time to focus on his sex and submissive needs. The result is he gets more sexual attention (less orgasms but much more intense sexual experiences). Our sex life is definitely more than what it would be without WLM and I'm pretty certain his sex life is much better than most guys his age. It is not all work and no play. Most guys only dream about some of the things he has experienced with me :)
DeleteYou are right, Mz Kaylee. I know he is happy with you and your marriage. Otherwise he wouldn’t be working so hard to please you everyday. It’s like they say “Love what you do and you never have to work a day in your life”.
DeleteThomas loves you and loves to please you. I need to change my perspective about chores. Women are so smart, especially you, Mz Kaylee. I really like this blog. Such good advice for men.
You are so naughty, Mz Kaylee. Not only do you know how to make a man do what you want, but you also make him love doing it. You must be a wild Tigress in the bedroom.
DeleteJust when you think you have seen it all, my wife proves otherwise. This past week she has been upset with me, no spankings thankful, but the weekend was not here. Sure enough Saturday afternoon, she told me that this past week was going to be addressed. To the bedroom we went and while she pulled the chair out, got the hairbrush, I took off and folded my clothes, saying nothing. She told me to sit on her lap, and I did. You have been such a naughty little boy, did you not think I would know you were looking a naughty pictures on the computer. I said sorry, she smiled, and said I know you will be sorry. She then reached for the baby oil and my limp penis was soon covered with it. Her hand soon was stroking it, I said please, I'll won't do it again, and I was soon hard, and she stroked faster, I soon cummed, and she continued until I was drained. Get to the bathroom, she cleaned me off, and then back to the bedroom. Over my lap she said sternly and doing as told, she started with the hairbrush, not her hand, I was soon squirming, kicking, pleading. When she stopped, she stood me up, told me to the front room, face the wall no talking, no rubbing. When the wall time ended, I stood before her, told she will continue to use the baby oil when needed. Then the worse of all, it was only mid afternoon, told to put on my little boy jammies, I looked at her, another word, and your bottom is really going to be stinging, Yes I said and for the rest of the day I wore the jammies and was put to bed early.
ReplyDeleteMz Kaylee
ReplyDeleteIn regards to corner time/maintenance-
Can you give a little insight on what occurs?
I was curious if there is much communication on behavior and expectations. I imagine at some point in the wlm, the roles become very defined and established where the wife fully understands her power and responsibilities, and the hubs comprehends and grasps the submissive role without question.
Is there a point where everyday appears to be the norm on what's to be done or does everything still need to be listed out?
Thanks!
Corner time always follows the weekly review session. A good review means short corner time (the purpose being a short meditation to help him refresh his mind and stay focused on serving me). A not so good review results in longer corner time as a mild punishment. As noted in the post, most reviews are positive so it’s usually me telling him that he is doing good. I will also use the time to review our upcoming calendar for the week (kids activities, dr appts, etc). This is also the time where I may introduce a new rule. The review time usually only lasts a few minutes but they are effective.
DeleteMz Kaylee,
ReplyDeleteThank you for the posts and answering our questions so thoughtfully! I am grateful :)
Is Thomas still on an allowance, does the financial aspect impact your weekends and weekdays?
Thanks (again)
robby.
Yes. He is on an allowance. If he wants to purchase items above his allowance he must ask my permission. He is not one to make frivolous purchases so it is rare that I say no but I still want him to seek my approval. I’m not sure how this would affect our week or weekend. Perhaps I misunderstood your question.
ReplyDeleteHi Mz Kaylee, could you let us know who is the breadwinner in your house?
DeleteMoney control is excellent and I believe it gives you extra power to dominate.
Raj
My husband is the breadwinner. Money can be power but not in our case. As a married couple it should not matter who makes the most $$. Prior to WLM our pay checks always went into a joint account and we jointly used the money. I never understand married couples who kept separate accounts. What’s changed since WLM is that I have final say on how the $$ are spent and he needs to ask permission to spend above his allowance.
DeleteDear Mz Kaylee and fellows readers,
ReplyDeleteDo you ever try “femdom toilet” or golden shower ? I tried a lot from my wife and I think it is most humiliating stuff I ever tried. Please share if you think it is acceptable. Thanks a lot.
David
To each his/her own. Personally I think it is disgusting but I don't judge.
DeleteNo, that does not appeal to me. As sub hub said ‘to each his own. If it works for you then that’s great.
DeleteHello and thank you for this post.
ReplyDeleteYes it's normal for a submissive husband to do the housework.
All submissives should be happy to do this, and do it on their own. Without receiving any order or control from their mistress.
In reality, men need control because it turns them on, it's their motivation to stay submissive.
Women know how to do this very well because society has taught them to do this. They don't need a reward.
In fact, a perfectly submissive man should be a model wife.
Michel (google translation)
Michel, this is exactly my feeling. I am slowly being turned into the perfect 1950's stereotypical housewife. I am expected to be meek and demure to my wife. I take care of the house and she makes the important decisions. I am expected to submit and support her without question. She has learned how to dominate me using my sexual arousal against me. Much like the entitled male of past generations, my wife expects me to keep her sexually satisfied without regard to my sexual needs. In short I am becoming what was thought of, in the past, as the perfect wife. With her sudden interest in humiliating me using lingerie I am beginning to feel the part. I think we have both found a comfort zone that we have never felt before. There is no longer any elusion on my part that I am equal in any way to my wife. I have made peace with the fact that I am a submissive male and this is the life I was meant to lead. Stay Safe- Alan
ReplyDeleteVery nice. I often think of my husband as a housewife and maid and he loved it.
DeleteAlan, we share the same point of view. only one thing questions me. You say: "With her sudden interest in humiliating me using lingerie". For me, wearing feminine clothes is not humiliating. I find them beautiful, sexy, delicate. they help me to invest myself in my role. I like nightgowns for making love, blouses for household chores, etc.
ReplyDeleteThink of it as a horizontal line with full masculinity on one end and full femininity on the other. I have been slowly pulled from the masculine side toward the feminine side. She now controls my penis, time, money, and freedom of movement. Wearing a bra pulls me across the imaginary middle line into the feminine side. My worry comes from where her intentions lie. Is she intent on pulling me further down that line and if so how much further. At this point a lot of my objections fall on deaf ears. Take care- Alan
DeleteDear Mz Kaylee,
ReplyDeleteI firmly support my wife in her belief that my weekly review is central to the success of our marriage. It was what helped formalise the rules of a wife led marriage when we were starting out and it now keeps the balance in the relationship on an even keel. For us it is quite a formal occasion and is held on a Monday morning. I have to wait outside her study on all fours and with my forehead on the floor until I am either called to enter, or she opens the door and invites me in. I am not allowed to wear anything apart from my cage and I go and kneel in front of her chair. I am always pretty confident that she will be pleased with me and sometimes the review is over in five minutes. At other times she will go through an essay I have written on a certain topic. This could be on anything - why do I like wearing tights to the importance of obedience... anything that she wants to know more on. Once she even wanted to know more about Brexit! She will grade my essays on both grammar and content and even though I say so myself I am a grade A submissive! Very rarely is there any punishment involved, although it has happened a couple of times in recent months. She has a leather paddle which she keeps on her desk. More often I am sent to the corner while she carries on working for what she calls Reflection Time. This can range anywhere from half an hour to much longer. My favourite part is at the end when I am allowed to kneel in front of her and hug her around the waist. It might sound odd but my wife is not really into kink as such. Just before I leave her study she informs me how much time I am allowed each day on the iPad. She has the passcode. I am allowed to visit certain sites only. Mainly sissy, chastity and lingerie sites, which she monitors, as well as sites with limited nudity. Yours is definitely one of my favourite sites Mz Kaylee!
Sissy Jenna
I absolutely love your Monday routine! It is fabulous and I bet it makes you feel wonderfully submissive. Thank you for sharing.
ReplyDeleteMostly I love it because as you say it makes you feel wonderfully submissive. I don't like the paddlings when they happen and the longer Reflection Times can be quite hard but I now can't imagine how I could be any closer and loving towards my wife - and she towards me - and I think the weekly reviews help that enormously. How can it not, when you open up your very soul to another person?
DeleteSissy Jenna
Sorry to "interrupt" but I think this is important. Ms. Kathy, in the Femdom101 blog once talked about Femdom and politics. Not only about spring Female candidates, as she had a Female only night about that with her husband slave John required to serve and be seen but not heard, but most importantly, she takes about how men should only vote as directed by their Female owners / or their responsible Female. I think if this is done, it should be only by mail - not only because the Female can check the ballot process but also because I think it sends a string message to see only Females lined up to vote on election day. But I think ideally men shouldn't vote or be part of politics. That's not out of hatred towards men at all, that's just out of a do respect for gender roles, Femdom, and an admiration of Females and a love of Female leadership. I think men should openly campaign for an end to male suffrage and I think it's super cute when they do that, always at the behest and direction of Females. I also think it sends a string, loving and firm, Femdom message. Long live the Queens of this works!
ReplyDeleteLovely fantasy. I've seen many men wanting to go to the old housewife stereotype.
DeleteWe are not big in Politics and we usually match but this time Queen and I would have voted differently. She welcomed a couple of discussions where She expressed her points and let me respectfully express mine. As with many things, I thanked Her and let Her know I was going to follow Her choice. The few times we engaged in comments with a couple of people I was united and backed Her choice.
Wow gigi, that idea is pretty far out there :0
DeleteTo each his own of course, but IMO, what you describe would have for more reaching effects than just a perceived overall benefit to "women". There are many of us that identify as a submissive male/husband, but don't feel that women are superior just because they are women. In my life, I am alpha, in charge and a mentor to many people ... men and women. There are some men, and some women that deserve the honor of respect and admiration, and clearly there are others that don't. Separating them into Superior/inferior classes merely because of their sex would be a disaster, again IMO. I have no problem showing respect, honor and admiration to any woman that commands it. I am happily submissive to only one woman however, my beloved Wife Mistress K.
DeleteJust a different opinion from yours.
Fortunately my husband and I are aligned when it comes to politics so it is not an issue in my house but I do like the idea that in a WLM the guy should vote at the direction of his wife. Gigi - keeping men out of politics is a fun fantasy but I do agree with others, that it would not be for the best in reality. Submissive does not mean dumb or weak. There are many men who are great leaders and have great ideas. Diversity is important. OF course it would be nice if those men in power were in a WLM and were taking direction from their wife :)
Delete"There are many men who are great leaders and have great ideas. Diversity is important. OF course it would be nice if those men in power were in a WLM and were taking direction from their wife :)"
DeleteMany of those (us) men that may be great leaders and have great ideas are also living happily and healthily in a WLM marriage. We'll never know for sure, but I'll bet there are plenty more men in power than any of us ever thought that are in a loving and acknowledged WLM.
Mz Kaylee,
ReplyDeleteWonderful post! I try to incorporate your practices in our vanilla setting, and I see how important The Weekly Review is. We started last weekend after reading this post.
The more you share, I realize that this is not about sex but about channeling the energy. This gives me hope that wives for whom kink is a big barrier can still take advantage of this.
Couldn't agree with you more my friend. It (FLR/WLM) is NOT only about and never has been. For those that think or wish it to be that way are more apt to want to wallow in the sometimes fetish aspect of it.
DeleteIf the goal for both people (but especially for the woman) in a WLM is anything other than a more beautiful and pleasurable life for the woman, then it is likely for the peddling of and receiving a perceived fetish.
To each their own.
Yes khorina, you are catching on. It's fantastic to hear you make that observation.
DeleteThank you, Mz Kaylee.
DeleteI'm interested in applying all this in vanilla settings. In the marriages we work with, the wife usually has the best vision/goals. The removal of kink allows us to discuss chastity, wife empowerment, leadership, channeling men's sexual energy. My vision is to create a program/challenge to reach the couple's goals through those concepts.
Dear Mz Kaylee,
ReplyDeleteI was wondering if you have a specific ritual or protocal in case you notice John slacking of and what do you consider the most effective on getting him back on track??
Thank you in advance and love
Tiptease
sorry Thomas
ReplyDeleteIn reference to voting, for some reason my wife takes great delight in voting for both of us, and not discussing it at all. We normally discuss all important issues , but with voting she just instructs me to sign my already marked and sealed ballot.
ReplyDeleteIt does give a certain submissive pride to experience her dominant sense of confidence and entitlement!
John
In reference to voting, for some reason my wife takes great delight in voting for both of us, and not discussing it at all. We normally discuss all important issues , but with voting she just instructs me to sign my already marked and sealed ballot.
ReplyDeleteIt does give a certain submissive pride to experience her dominant sense of confidence and entitlement!
John
That’s great. I think if you have a goddess with FLR, it is not necessary to care about the politics. All you need to do is wholeheartedly serve your goddess.
DeleteSorry this comment is so late to the discussion, but i feel that in an FLR the woman should make the decision on who to vote for. The male can have input but in the end he should abide by her choices. The female could even have her male research the candidates and issues, then report this information to her, allowing her to make an informed decision. This ultimately provides her with two votes, which to me makes more sense than forbidding the male to vote. This scenario would help the female make the best decision while at the same time reinforcing her dominance over her male.
ReplyDeleteI have this image of men across the country, behind closed doors, kneeling naked before their wives while she informs them how they are going to vote. And I agree with Mz Kaylee that things would be better if more men in power were in FLR's and listened to their wives.
It sounds as if your husband is an extremely lucky chap Mz Kaylee
ReplyDelete