Hi all. I've been out of town for several days so I am running behind on the next part of the Busy Dominant but I will have it posted soon. It is great to see all the comments and those who are sharing their Ideal FLR State. I was impressed at what I saw when I returned home. I will comment once I get up caught so please keep them coming.
Something that has come up in discussion in the comments is quantity versus quality when it comes to this blog. Gigi and John I appreciate you honesty and candor in this discussion. The reality is that I I have other priorities that keep me from posting regularly and I do not foresee that changing anytime soon. I hope the blog can still be a regular source of information for those interested in FLR. In addition to my posts, the comments are a good source of information as well that often continue long after the post. I like Gigi's idea of getting more people to comment. Unfortunately these blogs are not very conducive to conversation but I have an idea. I once took an online class in which the professor required us to post a thought every week. Then within a few days each person had to pick another person's comment and respond to it. Let's give that a try. Please pick at least one other person's comment in the Busy Dominant series of posts or in the Ideal FLR State post and respond to it. You can agree or compliment them, inquire about more information/ask them to elaborate, provide a counter view, or share a similar example. If you haven't commented yet then go ahead and jump in and provide your thoughts. Are you up for the task?
-Mz Kaylee
Monday, June 26, 2017
Monday, June 19, 2017
The Busy Dominant Wife - Part III Date Nights and the Less Than Ideal State
I hope you are enjoying this series. Several days ago I posted a question to ask what your ideal FLR state is. Thanks so much John D and Gigi for responding. I hope many more will respond so that we can learn from each other. There is no wrong answer. Everyone is different and what's right for you may be different than someone else. I also believe that taking the time to think about your ideal state and writing it down is great exercise to get you moving in that direction or to maintain the state. Years of research suggest that those who write down their goals are more likely to achieve them than those that don't write them down so get writing....:)
In Part II of this topic, John Dalton commented about "using FLR as a tool of strength to overcome issues rather than a toy to discard when there is no time to play." That is a fantastic analogy and a great mindset for Women leaders. We should always be looking to our FLR and submissive husband as tools to get things done and make our life better and happier. When things get tough or busy we need to rely on the strength of the FLR and deal with the challenges within the framework of the FLR. Even though it may be initially easier to do things ourselves, for the benefit of the relationship it is important to delegate responsibilities and tasks to our husbands. In the long-run it is better for the relationship and is better for you. Below are a few more strategies to use to keep your FLR from going off the track during the busy times.
3. Schedule Date Nights and Getaways - A regular date night is a great way to stay connected and is a common technique that many couples use. Planned date nights ensure that you spend quality time together. Weekly is nice but can be a challenge during busy times or if your have kids due to the need for a baby sitter (which can also get expensive). Some of my friends do date nights and monthly seems to be the common schedule. Thomas and I have monthly date nights. We write it in our calendar so that we do not forget. There is no need for you to be the one to plan the night either. When I am busy I leave it up to Thomas to plan the date. However, I must approve his plans. Usually it's just dinner and drinks or a movie. Sometimes we'll spend the day together at a festival or a day of shopping together. On occasion we'll go out with friends but most times it's just us two because the goal of date night is to spend time with each other. If we are lucky and get the house to ourselves, we may just stay in and have some fun together :). You can spice up the date nights by incorporating some of the fun ideas, which will be discussed in my subsequent posts.
Overnight getaways with each other are also a great way to stay connected and in my opinion, a must have. I will plan at least 2 overnight trips each year. It can be a long weekend or just an overnight trip. These getaways do not have to be fancy or expensive. The point is to spend time focused on each other. We will often stay within a few hours drive of home and stay at a cheap hotel or bed and breakfast. The nearby city or small historic towns are great destinations because usually there are activities nearby or nightlife that you can enjoy. When away, it easy to forget about the day-to-day stresses and activities and focus on each other. I have some of my best times with my husband on these short getaways and we tend to let our inhibitions run a little wild, which makes for even more fun. When we return home I am usually feeling refreshed and more dominant and his submission and obedience are at high levels.
3 Plan For a Less Than Ideal State but don't lose site of the ideal state. When busy times hit, you are not going to be able to keep your ideal FLR state intact. However, rather than let things just fall to the wayside, it's better to proactively figure out what will work and put a plan in place to make it happen. Set aside a 1/2 hour each week to reflect on the previous week and plan out the new week. Write down the plan and share it with your husband. This 1/2 hour a week of planning will go a long way in helping you stay connected to your husband, getting him involved with helping you, and getting you through the busy time and eventually back to the ideal state.
Review your ideal state and then figure out what things can still be easily maintained and what things will need to change. There are some no-brainers. For example, he should still keep up with his usual chores. With Thomas, I would expect him to always make my morning coffee. Your orgasm control and authority over him most definitely needs to stay intact. You may give him a little leeway in doing things or making decisions, but for bigger decisions he should defer to you and he should still be held accountable for inappropriate decisions.
Things that may need to change are items that affect your time or energy level. If daily massages won't work, designate one or two days a week for massages or tell him they will be on an "as-demanded" basis and he needs to always be ready to give you one. If you don't have time for regular discipline sessions, make them less frequent or provide the discipline feedback via notes, texts, or quick conversations. Focus on the bigger items that need correction and not the small battles. The discipline jar technique that I wrote about in a post last year has been very effective for me to provide discipline with little effort and good results. Also, make sure you assign him new chores or tasks to help you out. To free up your time, think about temporarily delegating tasks that you would normally not have him do. If things are hectic for you, he should share in it and be doing everything possible to help you. A FLR is a perfect structure for this so take advantage of it! If you delegate several small things to him, it can take a lot of stress off you and it frees up time for you to do the leading in the FLR.
Maintain the perspective of the leader and not the "do-er" in the relationship. Your first reaction should not be to jump in and do things. It is very easy to fall into that trap. Instead, your first thought should be, 'how can I get him to help me?' By spending time planning, delegating, and training him to do things for you, it will make your life a lot easier and keep the FLR strong. Do not lose sight of the fact that the submissive husband craves to be dominated and told what to do. Use that to your advantage!! Be dominant and confident and order him firmly to do things for you. He will love it and it will help you.
Trust me, he would gladly work his ass of for you if he knows he's going to get a nice "rub" as a reward or it will free you up for intimate time together.
This brings me to another important point. Making time for the 'rubs' and intimacy is important. Your planning needs to factor in not only your needs but also things to keep your husband motivated, obedient, and submissive. This is where many women struggle and often fail with the FLR. If you are like me, when I get busy or stressed, sex is the last thing on my mind so admittedly during hectic times it takes a conscious effort from me to keep the intimacy and sexual energy going. On the flip side, men are highly sexual creatures. During good times, bad times, sad times, and stressful times, they are thinking about sex. It is always on their mind. That is how the male is wired. When the sexual energy from you suddenly drops or cuts off, it negatively impacts his attitude. He becomes demotivated and can even be depressed. He may be doing his best to support you but on the inside he is most likely struggling with the lack of sexual attention. In an ideal world this would not happen, but lets face it, the male reaction is not always ideal. If you think back to the basics of FLR, orgasm control and teasing is one of the core techniques used in just about every FLR. That is because men are highly motivated by sex. You need to use this to your advantage, no matter what the situation.
This makes for a good stopping point. In my next post I will write more about orgasm control and get into the the fun ideas. Hope you are enjoying this series of posts. Please send feedback, thoughts, questions, or ideas...
-Mz Kaylee
In Part II of this topic, John Dalton commented about "using FLR as a tool of strength to overcome issues rather than a toy to discard when there is no time to play." That is a fantastic analogy and a great mindset for Women leaders. We should always be looking to our FLR and submissive husband as tools to get things done and make our life better and happier. When things get tough or busy we need to rely on the strength of the FLR and deal with the challenges within the framework of the FLR. Even though it may be initially easier to do things ourselves, for the benefit of the relationship it is important to delegate responsibilities and tasks to our husbands. In the long-run it is better for the relationship and is better for you. Below are a few more strategies to use to keep your FLR from going off the track during the busy times.
3. Schedule Date Nights and Getaways - A regular date night is a great way to stay connected and is a common technique that many couples use. Planned date nights ensure that you spend quality time together. Weekly is nice but can be a challenge during busy times or if your have kids due to the need for a baby sitter (which can also get expensive). Some of my friends do date nights and monthly seems to be the common schedule. Thomas and I have monthly date nights. We write it in our calendar so that we do not forget. There is no need for you to be the one to plan the night either. When I am busy I leave it up to Thomas to plan the date. However, I must approve his plans. Usually it's just dinner and drinks or a movie. Sometimes we'll spend the day together at a festival or a day of shopping together. On occasion we'll go out with friends but most times it's just us two because the goal of date night is to spend time with each other. If we are lucky and get the house to ourselves, we may just stay in and have some fun together :). You can spice up the date nights by incorporating some of the fun ideas, which will be discussed in my subsequent posts.
Overnight getaways with each other are also a great way to stay connected and in my opinion, a must have. I will plan at least 2 overnight trips each year. It can be a long weekend or just an overnight trip. These getaways do not have to be fancy or expensive. The point is to spend time focused on each other. We will often stay within a few hours drive of home and stay at a cheap hotel or bed and breakfast. The nearby city or small historic towns are great destinations because usually there are activities nearby or nightlife that you can enjoy. When away, it easy to forget about the day-to-day stresses and activities and focus on each other. I have some of my best times with my husband on these short getaways and we tend to let our inhibitions run a little wild, which makes for even more fun. When we return home I am usually feeling refreshed and more dominant and his submission and obedience are at high levels.
3 Plan For a Less Than Ideal State but don't lose site of the ideal state. When busy times hit, you are not going to be able to keep your ideal FLR state intact. However, rather than let things just fall to the wayside, it's better to proactively figure out what will work and put a plan in place to make it happen. Set aside a 1/2 hour each week to reflect on the previous week and plan out the new week. Write down the plan and share it with your husband. This 1/2 hour a week of planning will go a long way in helping you stay connected to your husband, getting him involved with helping you, and getting you through the busy time and eventually back to the ideal state.
Review your ideal state and then figure out what things can still be easily maintained and what things will need to change. There are some no-brainers. For example, he should still keep up with his usual chores. With Thomas, I would expect him to always make my morning coffee. Your orgasm control and authority over him most definitely needs to stay intact. You may give him a little leeway in doing things or making decisions, but for bigger decisions he should defer to you and he should still be held accountable for inappropriate decisions.
Things that may need to change are items that affect your time or energy level. If daily massages won't work, designate one or two days a week for massages or tell him they will be on an "as-demanded" basis and he needs to always be ready to give you one. If you don't have time for regular discipline sessions, make them less frequent or provide the discipline feedback via notes, texts, or quick conversations. Focus on the bigger items that need correction and not the small battles. The discipline jar technique that I wrote about in a post last year has been very effective for me to provide discipline with little effort and good results. Also, make sure you assign him new chores or tasks to help you out. To free up your time, think about temporarily delegating tasks that you would normally not have him do. If things are hectic for you, he should share in it and be doing everything possible to help you. A FLR is a perfect structure for this so take advantage of it! If you delegate several small things to him, it can take a lot of stress off you and it frees up time for you to do the leading in the FLR.
Maintain the perspective of the leader and not the "do-er" in the relationship. Your first reaction should not be to jump in and do things. It is very easy to fall into that trap. Instead, your first thought should be, 'how can I get him to help me?' By spending time planning, delegating, and training him to do things for you, it will make your life a lot easier and keep the FLR strong. Do not lose sight of the fact that the submissive husband craves to be dominated and told what to do. Use that to your advantage!! Be dominant and confident and order him firmly to do things for you. He will love it and it will help you.
Trust me, he would gladly work his ass of for you if he knows he's going to get a nice "rub" as a reward or it will free you up for intimate time together.
This brings me to another important point. Making time for the 'rubs' and intimacy is important. Your planning needs to factor in not only your needs but also things to keep your husband motivated, obedient, and submissive. This is where many women struggle and often fail with the FLR. If you are like me, when I get busy or stressed, sex is the last thing on my mind so admittedly during hectic times it takes a conscious effort from me to keep the intimacy and sexual energy going. On the flip side, men are highly sexual creatures. During good times, bad times, sad times, and stressful times, they are thinking about sex. It is always on their mind. That is how the male is wired. When the sexual energy from you suddenly drops or cuts off, it negatively impacts his attitude. He becomes demotivated and can even be depressed. He may be doing his best to support you but on the inside he is most likely struggling with the lack of sexual attention. In an ideal world this would not happen, but lets face it, the male reaction is not always ideal. If you think back to the basics of FLR, orgasm control and teasing is one of the core techniques used in just about every FLR. That is because men are highly motivated by sex. You need to use this to your advantage, no matter what the situation.
This makes for a good stopping point. In my next post I will write more about orgasm control and get into the the fun ideas. Hope you are enjoying this series of posts. Please send feedback, thoughts, questions, or ideas...
-Mz Kaylee
Thursday, June 15, 2017
What is Your Ideal State?
I will have the next part of "The Busy Dominant Wife" published soon. In the meantime I would like to hear from each of you on what is your ideal FLR state? I wrote about this in my last post and described my ideal state. Remember that it is not your fantasy. It is a realistic state in your FLR based on your current situation, which takes into account both your needs & desires and your partner's needs & desires. The ideal state can change and evolve over time. If you have a desire to achieve a certain ideal state over a longer period of time, that is fantastic. If you'd like you can describe your current ideal state and the ideal state that you hope to achieve in the future.
I would love to hear from both Woman Leaders and male submissives: What is your ideal FLR state? Are you currently in that state? It will be interesting to see if there is a difference between Women and men (please state if you are M or F if it is not obvious from your name).
-Mz Kaylee
I would love to hear from both Woman Leaders and male submissives: What is your ideal FLR state? Are you currently in that state? It will be interesting to see if there is a difference between Women and men (please state if you are M or F if it is not obvious from your name).
-Mz Kaylee
Friday, June 9, 2017
The Busy Dominat Wife Part II - Putting a Strategy In Place
In my last post I introduced the concept that when things get busy it often becomes a challenge to keep the structure of the FLR in place. However, it is during the busy times in which the leader should lean more on the FLR structure to help get through the busy time and reduce stress. In this post, I will provide suggestions on how to avoid falling out of the FLR routine and how to maintain your authority and control during the busy times. The post focuses on a few "theory" type ideas. My later post will get into some fun practical ideas for you to implement.
First the theory - think about what your ideal day-to-day FLR state would be. Make sure it is realistic and not fantasy. It should take into consideration what you want as well as the needs of your husband. For me it would include things like coffee made for me every morning, hubby keeps up with chores, nightly foot rubs and massages, discipline sessions twice a month, he pleasures me several times a week, his orgasms are 6 - 8 weeks apart, he receives several quick teases from me daily and more intense teasing at least once a week, etc.
The ideal state is what you should strive to achieve on a day-to-day basis for at least 50% of the time during the year. When you hit those times when it is not achievable, the best thing you can do is recognize the situation and put a plan in place to keep as much intact as you can. If the situation is short-lived, then it may be as simple as communicating to your husband that over the next week or two things are going to be hectic and that you expect him to still be on his best behavior. You could have him do an extra chore or two to help you.
If it is going to be longer, then thoughtful planning can go a long way in helping you get through the tough time while also keeping the FLR intact and keeping your husband motivated. Situations that can put a strain on the FLR include, a project at work that requires extra hours over a period of time, taking a class while also working, taking care of a sick parent, or multiple kids activities such as sports, play, and clubs. As a parent of teenagers, I certainly have been one of those people caught up in the whirlwind of activities that consume most of my time. It is the joy of my life to be involved with the kids activities but I also know it is important to spend time with my husband.
When the busy times hit here are a few strategic things that you can do to not lose focus and time with your partner:
1. Talk to him about the situation and tell him you need his help during the busy time. This sets the expectation that things are going to change a bit. Also, a submissive man will be more than happy to help. Remember, his motivation is to serve you and make you happy. You could play into his submissive nature and demand that he help you. Let him know that even though you may not have time to watch him closely, you expect him to keep up with his chores. By taking a firm and authoritative tone when talking about this, it will stir up his submissive desires and motivate him to work for you.
2. Plan "touch points" with your husband during the day and week. Quality alone time with each other is usually what suffers the most during the busy times. Force yourself to spend time together even if it is just a few minutes a day. Morning and evening are great times for this since these are the times you are most likely to be home together. It's as simple as waking up together and being in the same room. I leave for work before him but he wakes up at the same time as me and will get ready for work with me. In the evenings, go to bed together or establish a bed time routine. In my house my husband stays up later to do chores :) but when I go to bed he comes up with me and irons my clothes and gets his clothes ready for the next day. Then when I am in bed he goes back to his chores. Just being together for this short-time is enough to have quick conversations and catch up on things and stay connected with each other. Other things you can do is have breakfast together, a quick call during the day, or require him to text you during the day or evening. Leaving him notes is another way to create a touch point. I use notes frequently when I am busy. I can write them anytime during the day when I have free time and then leave them for him to read in the evening or morning. I will use notes to give him tasks and assignments to do, express dissatisfaction and issue punishments, instruct him what to wear during the day, or to express my appreciation/satisfaction for his obedience.
You can also incorporate routines and rituals into these touch points which will reinforce your authority, satisfy his submissive needs and keep him motivated. Our bedtime routine is that when I am ready for bed Thomas will go upstairs and get naked and put his robe on. He will make sure a dry towel is in the bathroom for me. If I am taking a bath he will draw the bath for me. When I undress he will have my robe ready for me to put on. Sometimes I will make him undress me, other times I will just have him remove my panties. When I am in the bathroom he goes about his usual business but when I come out he comes back to the bedroom to iron my clothes. If there is anything I need him to do, he will do it for me. He will also give me a massage, which includes kissing my body as he massages. If I desire, he will pleasure me. Then it's off to bed for me and he is off to finish his chores. When things get busy, the massages may not happen but he is still required to do all the other things and I do require him to kiss my feet every night when possible. There are some nights where our schedules are way off and we can not stick to the routine. However, the expectation from me is that when we are home together, the routine will occur unless there is some unusual situation. Having that routine is an effective way to feed his submissive desires. I certainly enjoy having him wait on me hand and foot but the little things like requiring him to be naked, requiring him to remove my panties every night, and requiring him to kiss my feet are motivators for him. These requirements help set the relationship apart from a traditional marriage and feed his submissive desires.
Some other ideas for morning or night routines are:
When you are busy, these touch points and routines will be a tremendous help in keeping you connected with your submissive husband and keeping him motivated to serve and obey you. During your busy times, if you can incorporate at least one routine daily, that is ideal. I would recommend that at a minimum you do one or two of the routines twice a week and have daily touch points. I personally enjoy being pampered and treated like a queen so I enjoy the routines. However, I want to emphasize that employing these routines during busy times is a planned strategy by you to keep him motivated and submissive. The primary purpose of these routines is not for your direct benefit. This is the "maintenance" to keep him submissive to you. For example, when a man kneels naked before his wife, removes her panties, and stares into her sex or upward at her naked body because he is required to, it sends a message to him that he is submissive to her, beneath her, and under her control. Doing this regularly keeps him submissive, obedient, and happy.
In my next post I will write about planning for date nights and the "less than ideal state."
The ideal state is what you should strive to achieve on a day-to-day basis for at least 50% of the time during the year. When you hit those times when it is not achievable, the best thing you can do is recognize the situation and put a plan in place to keep as much intact as you can. If the situation is short-lived, then it may be as simple as communicating to your husband that over the next week or two things are going to be hectic and that you expect him to still be on his best behavior. You could have him do an extra chore or two to help you.
If it is going to be longer, then thoughtful planning can go a long way in helping you get through the tough time while also keeping the FLR intact and keeping your husband motivated. Situations that can put a strain on the FLR include, a project at work that requires extra hours over a period of time, taking a class while also working, taking care of a sick parent, or multiple kids activities such as sports, play, and clubs. As a parent of teenagers, I certainly have been one of those people caught up in the whirlwind of activities that consume most of my time. It is the joy of my life to be involved with the kids activities but I also know it is important to spend time with my husband.
When the busy times hit here are a few strategic things that you can do to not lose focus and time with your partner:
1. Talk to him about the situation and tell him you need his help during the busy time. This sets the expectation that things are going to change a bit. Also, a submissive man will be more than happy to help. Remember, his motivation is to serve you and make you happy. You could play into his submissive nature and demand that he help you. Let him know that even though you may not have time to watch him closely, you expect him to keep up with his chores. By taking a firm and authoritative tone when talking about this, it will stir up his submissive desires and motivate him to work for you.
2. Plan "touch points" with your husband during the day and week. Quality alone time with each other is usually what suffers the most during the busy times. Force yourself to spend time together even if it is just a few minutes a day. Morning and evening are great times for this since these are the times you are most likely to be home together. It's as simple as waking up together and being in the same room. I leave for work before him but he wakes up at the same time as me and will get ready for work with me. In the evenings, go to bed together or establish a bed time routine. In my house my husband stays up later to do chores :) but when I go to bed he comes up with me and irons my clothes and gets his clothes ready for the next day. Then when I am in bed he goes back to his chores. Just being together for this short-time is enough to have quick conversations and catch up on things and stay connected with each other. Other things you can do is have breakfast together, a quick call during the day, or require him to text you during the day or evening. Leaving him notes is another way to create a touch point. I use notes frequently when I am busy. I can write them anytime during the day when I have free time and then leave them for him to read in the evening or morning. I will use notes to give him tasks and assignments to do, express dissatisfaction and issue punishments, instruct him what to wear during the day, or to express my appreciation/satisfaction for his obedience.
You can also incorporate routines and rituals into these touch points which will reinforce your authority, satisfy his submissive needs and keep him motivated. Our bedtime routine is that when I am ready for bed Thomas will go upstairs and get naked and put his robe on. He will make sure a dry towel is in the bathroom for me. If I am taking a bath he will draw the bath for me. When I undress he will have my robe ready for me to put on. Sometimes I will make him undress me, other times I will just have him remove my panties. When I am in the bathroom he goes about his usual business but when I come out he comes back to the bedroom to iron my clothes. If there is anything I need him to do, he will do it for me. He will also give me a massage, which includes kissing my body as he massages. If I desire, he will pleasure me. Then it's off to bed for me and he is off to finish his chores. When things get busy, the massages may not happen but he is still required to do all the other things and I do require him to kiss my feet every night when possible. There are some nights where our schedules are way off and we can not stick to the routine. However, the expectation from me is that when we are home together, the routine will occur unless there is some unusual situation. Having that routine is an effective way to feed his submissive desires. I certainly enjoy having him wait on me hand and foot but the little things like requiring him to be naked, requiring him to remove my panties every night, and requiring him to kiss my feet are motivators for him. These requirements help set the relationship apart from a traditional marriage and feed his submissive desires.
Some other ideas for morning or night routines are:
- Require him to kneel and kiss your feet or other part of your body before bed or each morning when you wake up
- Have him kneel silent while you dress and get ready for work (during this time you can order him to do things for you and help you get dressed)
- Have him dress/undress you
- Have him get your shoes for you or put them away, and have him put your shoes on/take them off.
When you are busy, these touch points and routines will be a tremendous help in keeping you connected with your submissive husband and keeping him motivated to serve and obey you. During your busy times, if you can incorporate at least one routine daily, that is ideal. I would recommend that at a minimum you do one or two of the routines twice a week and have daily touch points. I personally enjoy being pampered and treated like a queen so I enjoy the routines. However, I want to emphasize that employing these routines during busy times is a planned strategy by you to keep him motivated and submissive. The primary purpose of these routines is not for your direct benefit. This is the "maintenance" to keep him submissive to you. For example, when a man kneels naked before his wife, removes her panties, and stares into her sex or upward at her naked body because he is required to, it sends a message to him that he is submissive to her, beneath her, and under her control. Doing this regularly keeps him submissive, obedient, and happy.
In my next post I will write about planning for date nights and the "less than ideal state."
Wednesday, June 7, 2017
The Busy Dominant Wife
One of the challenges that many couples face is dealing with hectic schedules. It is far too easy to get caught up in late nights at work, kids activities, and other life things such as school, church activities, and volunteer work. These are all great things but when they converge together all at once it affects intimate time and "alone" time with your spouse. It is very important that you carve out time to spend with each other. It is great if you can do the above activities together as a couple, but it is also very important to give yourselves 1-on-1 time with each other. This is important for every couple regardless of your FLR status. Couples who do not allow for this 1-on-1 time on a regular basis may find that after many years of marriage they've grown apart from each other. No matter how busy you are, you need to make time for each other. Your spouse should be your number one supporter in your life, which is why it is important to keep your relationship with him strong.
In my next few posts I will provide suggestions on how to avoid falling out of the FLR routine and how to maintain your authority and control during the busy times. I'll start with a few "theory" type ideas and then get into some fun practical ideas for you to implement.
Stay tuned.....
When 1-on-1 time is lacking, couples grow apart and that "spark" begins to fade and so it is important to keep intimacy and personal time with your spouse as a priority in your relationship. There are always going to be times when things are hectic and often it is out of your control. However, your goal should be to minimize the hectic times and keep them short-lived. Hectic times should be moments in our life and not a lifestyle.If it is turning into a lifestyle, then you need to seriously evaluate what you are doing and change your path forward. Of course that is a whole discussion in itself and my intent with the post is not to discuss changing your lifestyle. What I do want to offer up is suggestions for managing your FLR during the busy and hectic times.
It is ironic that when we as female leaders are busy, we often rely less on our submissive husbands. This really is the time that we should be leaning heavily on them to do things for us. However, we get so caught up in the busy things that we forget to delegate work to them or just don't find the time to take advantage of the pampering or do the normal discipline and follow-through routines. Next thing you know weeks or months go by and you are completely out of your FLR routine and you have a very unhappy and mopey husband. During the busy times you should have an even stronger focus on dominating him and making him work for you instead of focusing on your busy work. Make him work for you so that you are not taking on all the stress and work. Oddly enough this will make him happier than if you were to become lax in your authority over him.
In my next few posts I will provide suggestions on how to avoid falling out of the FLR routine and how to maintain your authority and control during the busy times. I'll start with a few "theory" type ideas and then get into some fun practical ideas for you to implement.
Stay tuned.....
Sunday, June 4, 2017
New Post Coming Soon!
Where has the time gone! I can't believe it has been 5 weeks since my last post. Believe it or not, I have been busy writing over the last few weeks. One of my challenges with writing is that I like to be very structured and organized in my writing. I am not good at just writing off the top of my mind and producing post after post. If you read my posts, you know they tend to be a bit long. I recognize this is not the best approach for a blog because I know readers don't want to wait weeks in between posts. Unfortunately, the topic I a writing about now turned into a bigger post that I anticipated and is taking me a long time to write. I don't want to keep you waiting any longer so I've decided to break it up into several parts. Look for the first part in the next day or two. I will try to post each successive part no more than one week after the previous part. I also encourage you to read the comments in the past blogs. The comments often have information from readers that is just as informative as my posts. I have offered up my thoughts on most of the comments and I also encourage each of you to respond to other comments. I would enjoy very much if the comment section became an active conversation among all the readers and not just with me. I think the best way to learn and support each other is through sharing examples of what we do and discussing thoughts and ideas with others so please do not be shy about contributing.
Thanks all for reading my blog
-Mz Kaylee
Thanks all for reading my blog
-Mz Kaylee
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